


Man on the Moon

by cavedinwriter



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Gavin is super gay, Kinda, M/M, Ocs but theyre not important, Slow Burn, The major character death is temporary I promise, but not many, gonna be a bit more than 10 chapters yall, ralph is gonna show up yeet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-09
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-10-25 05:41:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 35,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17719172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cavedinwriter/pseuds/cavedinwriter
Summary: "As much as what was happening to Gavin felt like a bad sci-fi flick, the world around him didn’t reflect it. It was as normal a day as any, except after work he wouldn’t be going straight home. No, instead he was going to have shit plugged into his brain and get paid for it. Or something. He hadn’t exactly read carefully through the fine print."(Alternatively titled by my friend: 'Arrogant gay disaster repeatedly doesn't read the fine fucking print')





	1. That Ain't Real

**Author's Note:**

> Each chapter title is the name of a song, so I'll link to each one here in the notes! The songs don't have much bearing at all on each chapter, I just chose songs with fitting titles or lines in them. Man on the Moon (by Zella Day) was the inspiration for this whole fic so you should go listen to it!  
> This is the first thing I've posted here and hopefully it's not too horrible. I can't say I'm good at writing case fics but I did my best!
> 
> song: https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/that-aint-real-single/1445067188

**_‘Don’t believe everything that you’re told, baby_ **

**_..._ **

**_Even though none of it is actually real… it’s just an illusion’_ **

  


As much as what was happening to Gavin felt like a bad sci-fi flick, the world around him didn’t reflect it. It was as normal a day as any, except after work he wouldn’t be going straight home. No, instead he was going to have shit plugged into his brain and get paid for it. Or something. He hadn’t exactly read carefully through the fine print.

So, after work, he packed his bag and took the bus to a side of town he rarely visited. He had the (mis)fortune of a job that kept him poking around in seedier areas, so he wasn’t accustomed to the glossiness of the tech hub that was downtown. He stepped out of the bus and took in the buildings that towered overhead. The bright blue of the sky reflected off of the windows in a way that made him feel suddenly very small. He took a breath to clear his head and took out his phone to find the address of the place.

 

It took him longer than he would admit to anyone to find it, but he managed to get there right on time. The building was low and wide, with a coat of dark gray paint. He swallowed and made his way inside. The nerves that he had been pushing back were there in full force as the doors slid open to let him into the lobby. An Android with elegant, curly hair sat at the front desk and smiled.

“Hello, how can I help you?” It said.

“My name is Gavin Reed, I’m here to be experimented on or some shit.”

“Ah, yes! You’re part of our AHCRS program!”

“Yep.”

“Wonderful. Please take a seat, someone will be with you shortly to show you to your room.”

‘My room?’ Gavin thought as he sat down. What was this, a hotel? But he waited anyway, uncomfortable in the dark emptiness of the building. There was little ambient noise, and the only thing of note in the room was the Android. Designed to look like a woman, it had smooth dark skin and perfectly curled hair. Warm brown eyes that were almost human. Key word there, almost. That was the strangest thing to Gavin about Androids. They were so close to being human, they mirrored and mimicked so well, but there was nothing behind their eyes.

Deviants, on the other hand, made him uncomfortable for a whole new reason. It was just like looking at a person. The eyes weren’t empty. He knew it was his job to track deviants, but it got harder each time they caught one to see just how well they replicated human fear.

He wasn’t sure, given all this, why he was sitting in the waiting room of a place that wanted to use his brain to do research on Androids. He was in it for the extra cash, for sure, but there was a lingering curiosity that made him wait the 45 minutes that it took for someone to fetch him, instead of just leaving.

“Gavin Reed?” The man said as he entered.

“That’s me.” Gavin stood up. About fucking time.

“Please come with me.” The man was about his height, dressed in dark clothes that matched the building, but the rest of him didn’t. His hair was shaved on the sides but long enough on top to be tied up into a messy bun. None of the precision of everything else in the building. He had cold blue eyes, but they didn’t seem unfriendly. Just… disengaged, in a strange way that Gavin couldn’t place. He didn’t like it.

“My name is Elijah Kamski, and I’m in charge of this experiment. Today is only a preliminary check to get everything set up and to make sure it all goes smoothly.” Gavin didn’t respond, but internally he wanted to berate the man about leaving him waiting 45 fucking minutes for a ‘preliminary check’. He also noticed how familiar the name sounded, but he couldn’t place where he’d heard it before. Probably skimming some science article or something.

They continued down the halls, back and back and back until Kamski stopped at a door labeled AHCRS-1. His stomach turned over as he entered.

It was a large room, with a chair towards the back that was facing in. There were desks near the door, all facing towards the chair and covered in messes of wires and gadgets that Gavin didn’t understand. There were also several people, dressed much more formally than either Gavin or Kamski. They each stepped forward to shake his hand, saying their names, but Gavin could only concentrate on keeping his breathing steady.

“Gavin, in order for this to go smoothly, it's best if you stay calm.”

“Yeah no shit,” he replied tersely. He took a few more breaths and wiped his sweaty palms. “Okay. Okay, so what are you going to do to me?”

“First, we need to run a few tests to make sure you’re suited to this,” said a young woman(Bea? Was her name Bea?), “it should only take a few minutes. Please come over here.” She showed him to a desk where she ran several tests, none of which really made any sense to him.

“Great. While we're waiting on the results for that, we’re going to get you all fitted.”

“What? Fitted for what?”

“You did read the application thoroughly, right?”

“Yeah. Absolutely.” He nodded. She pursued her lips in a way that made it clear she didn’t believe him.

“We’re going to be connecting to and running a simulation in your brain. We need to make sure we can monitor it safely.”

“You’re not gonna… you’re not gonna stick anything in my head, are you?”

“No,” she sighed exasperatedly, “nothing physical, anyway.” She turned back to her desk, leaving Gavin to wonder what the fuck that meant.

A man came over to do the ‘fitting’, which mostly consisted of putting a weird belt on him and measuring wires against him. It took a lot longer than Gavin thought it should have, but then again what did he know? He didn’t read the fine print.

Eventually it was over; Bea said he was suitable for the experiment and to come back next week, and he was all fitted(whatever that meant). Kamski led him back to the lobby. When he stepped back outside, he felt relief breathing in the (semi)fresh air. He hadn’t realized how stuffy it had been in that building. He looked up at the sky once again. It was dark, now, but the clouds looked brown from the light pollution. He sighed. Someday he would see a clear night sky.

 

He wasn’t sure how, but he found himself back in the AHCRS-1 room once again. It was a week after the ‘preliminary check’, and he was still as nervous as the first time he set foot in the room. This time, things immediately kicked off. Bea gave him the weird belt to put on, and helped him not get tangled in the wires. She connected two sets of wires to each of his temples, one on the back of his neck, and one on his chest. She then handed him a clipboard and a pen.

“This is another consent form. It’ll let us drug you, so I advise you read it carefully,” she was only half joking.

“Why the fuck do you need to drug me?” Gavin asked incredulously.

“Because unless you want to stay in this room with all of us watching and waiting for you to fall asleep, you’re going to want to take something to sleep.”

“And this will only work if I’m sleeping?”

“Unconscious, yes. Don’t expect too much from this time though, this is somewhat of a test run. We probably won’t see very concrete results until a few sessions in.”

“Huh.” Gavin scanned the form she had handed him. Consent to be given sleeping pills, basically, all that shit. Whatever. He signed the form and handed it back to Bea. “Just don’t fucking murder me or anything.”

“I don’t think that would help our research,” Bea snorted. Kamski walked up to them.

“Alright, Gavin, we’d like to get started as soon as possible.”

“Sure, Whatever.” Gavin wasn’t sure what was making him so passive. It was a nice change of pace from his regular job, so he chalked it up to not wanting to mess with that. Besides, Bea seemed friendly enough. He wasn’t sure about Kamski, wasn’t sure if he really trusted him, but what the hell. He put himself in danger enough as a detective, why not try something new and equally terrifying?

So, he sat in the chair as they instructed, took the pills as they instructed, counted backwards from 10 as they instructed…

 

And then he woke up. His head hurt, bad, and he didn’t want to be awake. In fact, he wasn’t sure he had woken up by himself. As he came around, he saw someone shaking his shoulder.

“Fucking- what, what?” He pushed the man’s hand away. He blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting of the room once again. “Shit, how long has it been?”

“About 15 minutes.” The man next to him responded, offering a hand to help him stand. Gavin didn’t take it.

“15 minutes? That couldn’t have been long enough, I don’t remember anything.”

“Nothing at all?” That was Bea, walking over.

“No. Wait-“ Gavin caught a flash of something in his mind. Bright, blinding white, and then brown and blue. Every time he tried to focus on the memory it slipped out of his grasp. “Shit. Can’t remember.”

“That is quite unfortunate, if expected. We do know that something happened though, because we were monitoring your brain activity.”

“Was I just… dreaming, maybe?” He frowned. He still didn’t understand exactly what was supposed to be happening.

“Sort of. This simulation is similar to a dream, so it shows up on our systems as something resembling a dream. Rest assured, we can tell the difference.” Bea started unclipping the wires from him.

“Wait is that- is that it?”

“For today, yes. We do ask that you start some way of keeping track of things that happen here for yourself, like a journal or something. Especially because it is likely that you will recall something later, and we want to know as much about this as possible.”

“Uh… Alright, I guess. I’ll start a fuckin journal.” Gavin said. Once again, Kamski led him to the door. He wondered if, once he got a handle on the twisting corridors of the building, he could just let himself in. It was dark when he got outside again, and still cloudy, if less than the night last week.

As he started towards the bus stop, he remembered what Bea had said. He pulled out his phone and searched for the nearest bookstore. There was one nearby, and thankfully it wasn’t closed yet.

He bought himself a small black dream journal. It wasn’t really going to be a dream journal, he supposed, but that was the closest thing he could relate it to. Trying to remember what happened sure felt like trying to remember a dream. He was still tired from the sleeping pills, and found himself struggling to keep his eyes open as he got to his apartment. As he stumbled into bed, a figure crossed his mind. Tall. Black shirt. White walls. Then, nothing.


	2. White Sky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "“Gavin Reed?” A smooth voice was coming from somewhere in the room. Gavin could barely focus. “Gavin Reed?” It called again.  
> “What?” He forced himself to his feet. As soon as his feet connected with the ground, everything snapped into place. Well. Almost everything."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2kz3_-arR9g
> 
> Fun game to play while reading this: see if you can spot all the times that Gavin gets gayer!

**_‘A pair of mirrors that are facing one another_ **

**_Out in both directions, a thousand little Julias’_ **

 

Gavin had written down the colors that came to mind when he tried to remember. White, first and foremost. A blinding white. Black, flashes of brown, and blue, maybe. He couldn’t remember past that. Not as he was making breakfast the next day, or while he was getting dressed or riding the bus. Not while he had a cup of coffee at his desk, not as he opened the file he was working on. And then Connor walked in next to Lt. Anderson, and Gavin nearly spit out his coffee.

 

“ _Who the hell are you?”_

 

Connor seemingly noticed Gavin’s shocked look.

 

“ _I am an RK900.”_

 

“Detective Reed, are you alright?” He looked concerned, or as close as an Android could get to looking it.

“Fucking fine, just didn’t want to see your fucking face this early in the morning.” Gavin snarled. Internally, he was freaking out. He could remember beyond colors, now. He remembered a face. It was Connor’s face, but it wasn’t… it wasn’t Connor. It was stiffer, and taller, and it had a black turtleneck. He knew it wasn’t Connor. It wasn’t an RK800 like Connor, it was an RK900. They weren’t in circulation though, were they? They weren’t even being worked on. Connor was still a prototype!

He pushed the confusion out of his mind long enough to scribble down in his notebook: _Connor’s face. RK900. Black turtleneck?_

He couldn’t help from glancing at Connor throughout the week, trying to figure out why he had seen him in the dream. Or simulation. Or whatever.

 

“It was an RK900,” was the first thing out of Gavin’s mouth as he got back to the AHCRS-1 room.

“Very good, Gavin,” Kamski looked at him appraisingly. He wasn’t sure that he liked it. “What prompted you to remember?”

“There’s uh- there’s an Android at the precinct I work at. An RK800. They’ve got the same face.” Gavin said.

“Fascinating.” Kamski said, in a way that made it sound like he knew something. What that was, Gavin didn’t know. He still seemed so familiar. “Bea, make sure you record that.”

“Absolutely.” She responded immediately. Something Gavin had noticed was that Kamski seemed like he was in charge, and certainly acted like it, but Bea seemed to be doing most of the work. It was impressive really, how much she was doing. “Hopefully, since you remembered a bit from last session, you’ll immediately remember more from this one. Shall we get started?”

“Sure. Oh, uh, should I be writing down things I remember being said?” Gavin asked.

“Absolutely! Was there anything last time ?” Bea’s face lit up with curiosity.

“Not last time, I was just wondering. For the future.”

“I see. Well, you should write down any specifics if you can, or just tell us directly.” With that, Bea set him up again in the chair with the pills. He counted backwards, and this time, he saw the white walls clearly.

 

“Gavin Reed?” A smooth voice was coming from somewhere in the room. Gavin could barely focus. “Gavin Reed?” It called again.

“What?” He forced himself to his feet. As soon as his feet connected with the ground, everything snapped into place. Well. Almost everything.

He himself was okay, he was solid and standing there. The white of the floors and the walls blended together into a meaningless void, but there was one more thing that wasn’t quite there.

An Android, standing at the other end(?) of the room from him. It looked just like Connor, only less puppy-like. This one was taller, with lower set eyebrows and piercing blue eyes. It was wearing a black turtleneck, which he had never considered an intimidating item of clothing until now. Its pants were also black, but something was wrong with them. If he tried to focus on them, he couldn’t. Something about the message going to his brain, trying to process the legs just wasn’t working. It hurt his brain to try to see them, so instead he focused on its face.

“RK900?” He asked.

“That is me.” The Android responded. “I was wondering when you would be back.”

“Do you… remember last time?” It felt like talking to someone who already knew you, but you had never met.

“Yes. It is very difficult for me to forget things.” The Android looked around. “I suppose you do not yet have control over our environment.”

“What, is that something I can do?” Gavin asked incredulously.

“Yes. We discussed this last time, though I suppose you do not remember. That is okay, you will eventually be able to. Hopefully you can see more of me than just my face this time, though.”

“Yeah, my head hurts like a bitch if I try to look at your legs.”

“Interesting.” The Android responded.

And just like that, he was back in the AHCRS-1 room.

 

Gavin’s head didn’t hurt any less this time. In fact, it might have hurt more. His mouth was dry, too, but this time he had woken up by himself. Bea helped him to his feet.

“I-I remember it.” He mumbled, still struggling to keep his eyes open. Bea’s face lit up. She shoved her clipboard at him.

“Please, write everything that you can remember.”

“Okay, Jesus. Just give me a moment.” He rubbed at his eyes, then sat back down in the chair and wrote on the clipboard.

_RK900 was taller than Connor. My head hurt if I tried to look at its legs. Everything else was white, but it was a room?_

Bea took it when he was done and read it quickly.

“Seems like you will remember more each session, and possibly spend more time unconscious. This time you were out for 25 minutes.”

“Shit, really? It felt like 5.”

 

The next session, there were solid walls in the room, and he could see RK900’s legs. The fourth session, there were windows. It had never occurred to Gavin that there might be something outside of the room that he and RK900 were in. The fifth session, he could see colors outside of the windows.

 

“Hey, I wonder if we could go out there,” he said nonchalantly, “What do you think, Nines?”

“Nines?” RK900 questioned.

“Listen, I don’t want to have to say RK900 every time I talk about you, it’s a real mouthful. I’d considered some other names, but Nines is the least insulting one I thought of,” Gavin snapped.

“Nines it is, then. And I believe for us to get outside of this room, there would first have to be a door.”

“Shit. You’re probably right.”

 

That had been it. The conversations felt like they were the same length each time, but every time he went back there seemed to be still some things Nines knew that Gavin didn’t. Bea had also given him a small couch to sit on in the room, instead of the uncomfortable desk chair that he fell asleep in each time. This did unfortunately mean that he awoke on the floor of the white room each time.

When he handed back the clipboard to Bea that said _“Nines and I talked about the windows and how to get out of the room.”_ , Bea frowned.

“I started calling it Nines because RK900 is a mouthful.” He explained.

“I see.”

 

Gavin still didn’t like how closely Nines resembled Connor. It had been hard to see the differences in the beginning, and even though he had an easy time differentiating now, it was off-putting to see Nines’ face one night and then Connor’s the next day. He considering talking to Lieutenant Anderson about it, but he figured it would be pretty weird. He also didn’t want to have to deal with the inevitable questioning about what the hell he was doing being a part of this experiment.

So he kept it to himself, though it was such a strange experience that he found himself itching to tell someone. He couldn’t, though. He wasn’t exactly close to many people at the DPD. He considered telling Tina, but he figured he should wait until he could explain what the fuck he was doing. She had been feeding his cats the nights he got home late though, so he felt like he owed her to tell her what was going on.

 

Gavin waited for 10 minutes in the waiting room, and then stood up. He was pretty sure he knew the way to the room, so he started walking. The Android at the desk looked at him, but she didn’t stop him. He made his way back through the building, and eventually as he knew he was getting nearer to the AHCRS-1 room, he turned a corner and nearly bumped into Kamski.

“Fucking hell, you scared the shit outta me!” Gavin cursed.

“Gavin! Did Carrie tell you to come back?” Kamski raised an eyebrow.

“Who the hell is Carrie?”

“Our receptionist,” Kamski replied, and Gavin felt an unfamiliar rush of embarrassment for not knowing, “Well. I suppose you can start heading straight to the room when you arrive.”

“Cool. I just don’t like getting home so late.” Kamski shrugged his indifference and walked with him to the room.

 

This time, it took only a few moments for Gavin to adjust. He could see Nines clearly, and the walls, and the windows. Outside of the windows, the shapes and colors that had been taking form were solid now, and he could see a garden outside. He was so entranced by the garden that he forgot about Nines for a moment, until he cleared his throat. It. It cleared its throat.

“Gavin Reed.” It said.

“You can just say Gavin, you know,” He grumped.

“Alright. Hello again, Gavin.”

“Hi.” Gavin sat up and continued looking out of the window. “It’s been a while and no door has appeared.”

“This is true.”

“Since we can't go out a door… could you break the window?” Gavin suggested. Nines looked at him sharply.

“I do not think that is the best course of action to take.”

“Come on, don’t you wanna see what’s out there?” He crossed his arms.

“I cannot _want_ , Gavin. Though I admit, I am curious as to what is in that garden.” Nines conceded.

“So break the fucking window!” Nines started at him for a moment, LED on it’s temple blinking yellow. Then it turned to the window and rested a hand against it.

“Okay.” Without another word, or any sort of warning, Nines drew his arm back and threw a perfect punch, straight into the center of the window. Gavin felt the glass crack as though it was his skull and jolted back into the real world. He had one final thought as he was tugged away from the room and Nines’ perfect punch.

_‘Holy shit.’_

Gavin came to on the floor of the AHCRS-1 room with a splitting headache. The lights above him were so bright and everything was so loud, people shouting at each other, touching his shoulders and shaking him. He couldn’t tell if some of the shouting was coming from him or other people.

It took several minutes for his headache to subside enough for him to see what was going on. At some point, someone had gotten him back on the couch and handed him a glass of water. When his hands stopped shaking, he downed the glass of water and leaned back against the couch.

“Shit. Was that supposed to happen?” He moaned.

“We’re not sure. There’s nothing that’s strictly supposed to happen, but if you tell us what you experienced, we can tell you if that is the expected outcome.” That was Bea, sitting next to him. His head hurt too much to try to decipher what she had just said, so he could only mumble a response.

“He punched the window.”

“What?” Bea looked alarmed.

“No- I- I told him to. There wasn’t a door, and I wanted to go in the garden.” He knew he wasn’t making any sense, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to go home.

“You told him to break the window?” Bea looked more confused than alarmed, now.

“Can I go home?” He asked through gritted teeth. Bea shot a glance over to Kamski, who stared for a moment and then nodded stiffly.

“Alright. But as soon as you can, write a detailed account of what happened so you can tell us next time.”

“Okay, Yeah, Whatever.” He declined Kamski’s offer to walk him to the lobby. When he got outside, his head spun if he tried to look up so he kept his eyes on the ground.

He was finally home, but his headache had hardly eased. He scribbled a few words quickly in his journal, popped some Advil, fed the cats and then collapsed in bed. As he slept, the images from the room floated back into his head. Nines’ blinking yellow light, the way he held himself just before his fist flew out to punch through the window. Holy shit, he kept thinking. Holy shit. What it was directed towards, he wasn’t sure.


	3. Lethargy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Bright light blasted him, but it was different than the fluorescent white of the usual room. It was a gentle gold, making everything in the garden seem warm and inviting. There was a gravel path leading through golden grass that eventually raised into a wooden bridge."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=85jsqArcTU8
> 
> Hope y'all enjoy! I barely edit this stuff tho so sorry if it's Garbage.

**_‘Paint the scene for me_ **

**_..._ **

**_I don't wanna use my imagination here’_ **

  
  


Gavin was reading what he had written in his journal the night before. His mouth wasn’t dry anymore, but there was still some sort of feeling in his skull. It wasn’t quite pain, but it was uncomfortable.

_ I could see clearly out the windows, and it was a garden. It had all sorts of plants and it was sunny. I told him i wanted to go outside but there was no door. He said “I cannot  _ want,  _ Gavin.” I told him to punch through the window. He did, and it hurt like a bitch. Holy shit. That’s the last thing I was thinking. Holy shit. _

Shit. When had he started calling Nines ‘he’? 

The discomfort in his head was back. He shut his journal decisively and went to feed the cats.

“Alright, yeah I know you’re hungry, Mousetrap.” He did his best to refrain from tripping on the three cats(Mousetrap, Barn Bitch and Prissypussy) weaving between his legs. Once he had filled their bowls and checked that they had water, he pulled out his phone. After hesitating for a few moments, he called Tina.

“Hey, asshole.” She picked up immediately.

“Hi Tina,” he smiled.

“Why is a call at 8:30 in the fucking morning the first I've heard from you in weeks? Other than ‘hey can you feed my cats’”. She didn't sound like she was actually that pissed, but he knew he had minorly fucked up.

“That’s why I called you. I uh… I want to catch up. There’s been some things happening.”

“Oh, jesus.” She groaned, “What stupid shit have you gotten yourself into now.”

“You’ll see.”

“Great.” She sounded sarcastic, but Gavin could hear the smile in her voice. She was really the only person he would consider his friend from the DPD, but it wasn’t as though he sought out new friends. It was in fact the opposite. He knew he wasn’t a pleasant person to be around, but recently he had tried to be a little less obnoxious(For Tina’s sake).

 

“So… you’re telling me there’s a Connor lookalike in your brain,” Tina stared at him in disbelief, “Jesus, Reed, you’ve really lost it. Have you gotten  _ any  _ sleep?”

“There’s not- He’s not-“ Gavin struggled, “He’s not in my brain. I just… see him there? Shit, I don't know how to explain it.”

“This is why you read the fine print, Gavin,” she sighed.

“It was all sciencey, I don't know what that shit means! Anyway I’m not like… complaining or anything. It’s just really weird and I haven’t told anyone about it.” Tina sat back for a second, thinking.

“It sounds like a sex thing, Gav.”

“It's not a sex thing!” His face flushed, “What the fuck!”

“I’m just saying! Weird, handsome Android in you brain?”

“I never said he was handsome,” Gavin stood up.

“It was heavily implied,” Tina laughed, “But anyway, why don't you talk to Connor about it? Maybe he knows something about an RK900.”

“Maybe.”

 

And that is how Gavin found himself voluntarily talking to Connor for perhaps the first time.

“Hey, dipshit,” he slammed his cup of coffee down on Connor’s desk, “I need to talk to you.”

“If it is related to your coffee preferences, I regret to inform you for the 57th time that I do not take orders from you.”

“It’s not about coffee.” Connor looked up.

“I’m listening.”

“Okay. Uh, how much do you know about RK900s?” He decided to get straight to the point.

“Not a lot, to be honest. There are none in circulation currently. In fact, I don’t believe a physical model of one exists.”

“Huh. None at all?”

“No. I’m still a prototype, remember?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Gavin thought for a moment, “What about AHCRS? Do you know anything about that?” Connor’s LED blinked yellow briefly.

“Android Human Cognitive Relationship Simulation, correct?” Gavin nodded, “An experiment on the relationships formed between Androids and Humans in a regulated simulation-“

“I know that. What else?”

“There is not much more information that I can provide. What do you want to know? Perhaps I can answer a more specific question.”

“I-“ Gavin paused. It didn’t really matter if anyone knew about the experiment, right? “I’m part of the experiment. The model who’s… I guess in the simulation is an RK900.”

“Interesting. I’m afraid I still cannot provide more information.”

“Whatever. It’s fine.” Gavin started to turn away. Connor’s LED flashed yellow and he blinked rapidly for a few seconds, then stood up.

“Detective Reed, I have just received a call about a violent deviant attack. We should leave immediately.” 

 

It was hours later, and Gavin felt worse and worse with each passing minute. They had found the deviant incapacitated on the floor of an old man’s art studio. The man’s son had apparently gotten into a fight with the deviant, and it defended itself. The deviant was now sat at the table of the interrogation room, with Gavin sitting across from him. Every time he looked at the deviant, his head hurt. He couldn’t stand it. He left the interrogation room, telling Hank that he felt sick. Hank gave him a rough pat on the back.

When he got home he curled up in bed. He still felt like garbage, and something about that deviant made it worse. He was too tired to think about it right then, so he closed his eyes and drifted off, not paying attention to the fact that it was three in the afternoon.

 

“Ah, you’re back.” Nines said. Gavin sat up from his place on the floor. It was as if no time had passed, Nines was standing next to the broken window, and he was sitting where he had stood last week. “My apologies for what happened last time, it did not seem pleasant for you.”

“I had a fuckin headache all week.” Gavin snapped.

“That is unfortunate. You can get out of the room now, though.”

“Oh, shit, yeah.” He stood up and walked to the window and, avoiding the broken shards still on the frame, stepped outside.

Bright light blasted him, but it was different than the fluorescent white of the usual room. It was a gentle gold, making everything in the garden seem warm and inviting. There was a gravel path leading through golden grass that eventually raised into a wooden bridge. Everything around him looked perfect, too perfect, but for the time being he didn't care. He let out a small laugh as he looked around.  He heard gravel crunch and turned to see Nines step out beside him. As soon as he did, the white room disappeared.

“Holy shit.” Gavin said quietly. He took a moment to look clearly at Nines, and well… Holy shit once again. The yellow light made his face and eyes look softer, and it filtered through his hair in a way that made it glitter. Gavin was captivated. He hadn’t taken the time to really look at Nines before, but he was almost glad he had waited until this moment. He looked perfect.

“Gavin, are you alright?” Nines's voice broke the spell, and Gavin coughed and looked away.

“Yeah, fine. I just didn’t think it would be this nice out here.”

“It is quite lovely.” Nines turned his head slightly to look around, then started towards the bridge. Fuck, even his walk was perfect. His steps were even and steady and produced an effect where he seemed to be gliding. Gavin pushed the thoughts out of his head. He was  _ not _ going to get a crush on a weird robot that was in his brain.  _ So  _ not letting that happen, no matter how much satisfaction it would bring Tina. He followed Nines to the bridge, where he had stopped. 

“Man, I could get used to this. It’s a lot nicer than my apartment.” Gavin commented. Nines nodded. “Hey, did you just wait by that open window for me to get back? You know you could have gone out there without me, right?”

“It was not necessary,” he said, “And besides, you seemed to be excited about it. I wanted to experience it for the first time with you.”

“That’s weird.”

“Is it?” Nines cocked his head.

“A little,” Gavin said, “Hey, wait, does time pass for you the same way it does for me?”

“Yes. Do not be concerned, I cannot get bored.”

“Shit, you just wait here all week? What do you do?” Gavin turned to him.

“I wait. I told you, I cannot get bored.”

“That’s… that sucks, Nines. Don’t you get lonely?” He asked.

“No.” Nines replied. Gavin wasn’t sure why he disliked that answer so much. Shouldn’t he be glad that he wasn’t lonely? Fuck, why did he care anyway? He was still going over Nines's ‘no’ in his head as he was wrenched back into reality.

 

This time, it didn't hurt nearly as badly(thank fuck), but there was still a dull aching in his head. He took Bea’s clipboard which she had started putting on one arm of the couch for convenience.

_ The garden is really fucking pretty. Makes me want to stay there. Too nice. Time passes the same for Nines. “I cannot get bored.” “Don’t you get lonely?” “No.”  _

Kamski didn’t offer to walk him out this time, but instead walked wordlessly out with him. Gavin tried to ignore him, but once they were almost to the lobby, Kamski spoke.

“You’re doing very well, Gavin. Stay alert. You and Nines are making good progress.”

“I… thanks?” Gavin didn’t know how to respond. He still didn't know what to do with Kamski. He was usually pretty quiet, except for when he decided to spout weird bullshit like that. 

“Let me know if you need anything,” Kamski added, patting Gavin on the shoulder. Now he was just confused. Was he being flirted with? Threatened? He honestly couldn’t tell, but either way he wanted to get the hell outta dodge. He breathed a silent sigh of relief when they reached the lobby and he was able to rid himself of the scientist.

It was colder outside than he was expecting, and he took a moment to put his jacket on. He wondered if it would snow soon. He doubted it, the cold weather was only just beginning, but he had hopes. Barn Bitch had never seen snow, and he wondered what his reaction would be. Probably about the same as Mousetrap and Prissy, who both ran back inside as fast as possible. He chuckled thinking about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't blame me for Gavin's cat's names, I used the first three that my friend gave me which was maybe a bad idea.


	4. Pay No Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> '"This time, instead of counting backwards from 10, I’d like you to focus on something. It could be any object that you’ve seen. It could be a flower, or a pair of scissors, or a star. But pick something, and try to imagine it as vividly as you can.”'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BC_Ya4cY8RQ  
> I'm so glad y'all are enjoying this so far, I really wasn't expecting anyone to read it so thank you so much! Also uh. I did my best on the bits with Markus? But don't expect too much?

**_'She asked me how we got here, I told her I don't know!_ **

**_And if you keep on asking, I'll just keep saying so’_ **

 

Gavin was back on the bridge in the garden, standing next to Nines, but this time the sky was full of stars. There was a soft glow coming from the water that lit up Nines's face just so, and Gavin couldn’t help but stare. Fuck, he was pretty. His cheekbones were pronounced but not overly so, his nose was straight and his eyes caught the glow from the water in a way that made Gavin’s knees weak. Nines turned to look at him, and Gavin felt his face flush. He hadn’t meant to stare, but he just couldn’t take his eyes off of the Android. Nines took a step towards him.

“Nines, I didn't mean to- I wasn’t-“ Gavin was cut off as Nines grabbed his chin with one perfect hand and kissed him. _Holy shit_. His lips were much softer than he thought an Android’s could be, and- oh fuck. Gavin’s knees buckled as Nines kissed him again. Of course, the perfect fucking Android caught him, pushed him against the bridge railing, and kissed him again, sliding his tongue into Gavin’s mouth. Gavin wrapped one arm around Nines's neck and used the other to grab at his hair.

 

And of course, as all good things do, it came to an abrupt ending by the sound of a beeping phone. It took Gavin a moment to realize that he was not, in fact, making out with Nines. He was laying in bed, listening to his phone screech at him to get up. Fucking _delightful._ He groaned as he lay there, letting his alarm ring out. He did not want to get up, not after that fucking dream. Why the hell had his brain come up with that? And why had it felt so damn good? He tried to push the thought of the Android’s tongue in his mouth out of his mind. He didn’t have time for this shit. He had a case to solve.

Not thinking about Nines's mouth proved to be a difficult task for Gavin that day. It was difficult as he was making breakfast, it was difficult as he was feeding the cats, it was difficult even in the frigid shower he decided to take for his own sanity.

After he showered, he felt a little more refreshed, but dreaded getting to work and seeing Connor. He had pretty much the same face as Nines(save for the eyes, Nines had blue eyes and Connor had brown), so he wasn’t sure how that was going to go down.

“Good morning, Detective,” Connor greeted him.

“Yeah, whatever, dipshit.” Gavin snarled, then winced internally. He hadn’t meant to be quite so abrasive, but thankfully Connor didn’t notice or didn’t care.

“There have been some developments in the case that I think you should look into.”

“Fine. Android’s name is Markus, old dude is Carl, they were part of- shit, what?”

“Yes. That is why I thought you should see this. Apparently it was the reason for the altercation between Carl’s son, Leo, and Markus. He did not like that his father had such a connection with an Android.”

“That’s… Connor, this is basically what I’m doing.” Gavin looked at him.

“I realized that. I find it interesting that the name of the experiment is slightly different. Perhaps you would find it helpful to question the deviant about it.”

“Yeah, yeah I’ll ask Hank if he’ll let me.” He put the folder down and walked away.

 

“So. Android Human Relationship Experiment, huh?” Gavin sat opposite Markus at the interrogation table, arms crossed. Markus was cool and collected, but he clearly still looked shaken.

“You know about it?”

“Yeah.”

“How?”

“Doesn’t matter. What can you tell me about it?”

“They said they wanted to do research on the relationships formed between humans and Androids. They wanted to see what those bonds could endure,” Markus paused, looking Gavin in the eyes, “They didn’t like Carl, because he cared about me.  Leo didn’t like that either.”

“What do you mean by ‘they didn’t like Carl’?”

“He cared about me, and I cared about him. They knew that. They didn’t like it because I was supposed to hurt him. He was good to me, he didn’t deserve to be hurt.”

“You were supposed to hurt him? What does that mean?” Gavin raised an eyebrow. Markus broke their eye contact, and Gavin felt a cool hand on his shoulder. Connor.

“Detective, I believe it would be best if you were to cease your interrogation for now.”

“What? But I just-“

“Now.” Connor’s voice was firm. Gavin pushed his hand away and stood up.

“Jesus, okay.” He stormed out of the room. God, he was sick of everything. Sick of Connor being so polite all the time, sick of Nines being so fucking pretty, sick of being confused about cases all the time. The best thing that had happened to him all week was the fucking dream about Nines. God, he felt pathetic. At least there wasn’t really any… issue with Connor looking like Nines. They were different enough.

 

For some reason, Gavin felt just as uncomfortable the next week entering the AHCRS-1 room as he had the first time. He couldn’t place it. Something about the case didn’t sit right with him, and there was something about how Kamski watched him. The itching familiarity of the man was still in the back of his mind, but he hadn’t been thinking about it much. He was sick of the discomfort. He knew there would be more when he woke up, a headache and a dry mouth. He wanted that to be done with.

“Is there any way to make it so my head doesn't feel like it’s full of nails when I wake up?” He asked as Bea helped him get the wires on.

“Not currently, but we’re working on it. Has it been getting any less unpleasant, at least?”

“Yeah, and none as bad as the time with the window. It still fucking sucks, though.”

“I’m truly sorry.” With that, she handed him the pills. “Wait. Are you okay with being out for a little longer this time? We want to try something a little different.”

“Sure, I don't care. Knock me the fuck out,” he said sarcastically, taking the pills from her.

“Great. This time, instead of counting backwards from 10, I’d like you to focus on something. It could be any object that you’ve seen. It could be a flower, or a pair of scissors, or a star. But pick something, and try to imagine it as vividly as you can.”

“Okay. That’s weird as hell, but okay.” He sat back on the couch and put the pills on his tongue. He adjusted himself to be facing away from the center of the room, curled in towards the back of the couch as was his usual strategy. He had to move quickly, because once the pills dissolved, he would fall asleep quickly. He wished he had chosen his object before he took them, because he could feel his eyes closing before he could place something. Strangely, his mind kept wandering back to his dream. Specifically, the sky. It was a deep indigo, faded towards the horizon, only a little after sunset but still dark. There were stars glittering, far too many for it to be real, but it was beautiful.

 

It was beautiful, and it was above him as he came to on the wooden bridge in the garden. Nines was above him as well, leaning over.

“Hello.”

“Shit, why do I always have to wake up on the ground?” Gavin complained. He didn’t look at Nines as he stood up, for he was determined not to think about the dream he’d had.  He dusted himself off and looked around. “Huh.” The sky looked like it had in his dream, only it felt even more real. As he looked at the water, he saw that it was giving off the soft glow it had in his dream as well. He tried not to think about what that meant for Nines. It didn’t mean anything! It was just a dream. Just a weird, stupid dream that he needed to _stop thinking about,_ god dammit.

“It appears to be nighttime.” Nines commented.

“No shit.”

“This is the first time this has happened.”

“Wait, really?” Gavin turned to him, but didn’t look him in the eye.

“Yes. There is no day or night here.”

“Huh. Wait, I think I-“ Gavin looked at him excitedly, but then looked back at the ground, “I think I made the sky do that. And the water.”

“You’re gaining control of your surroundings,” Nines said, and Gavin hated how good the hint of approval in his voice made him feel.

“Kind of. They told me to picture something as I fell asleep, and… I dunno. I was thinking about the sky.”

“If I may ask, what caused you to choose the sky?”

“What does it matter?” Gavin snapped. He started walking down the other side of the bridge. He wasn’t even capable of having a normal conversation without freaking out, it seemed. Fun.

“It doesn’t, really.”

“Good.” Gavin stopped as he got to the end of the bridge. Usually he would start to wake back up again around this time, but everything still felt steady. In fact, if he tried to think about reality, it felt a little fuzzy.

 

“Gavin, I don’t believe you’ve told me much about your job.” Nines said, continuing down the path and stopping underneath a large willow tree. Gavin followed slowly behind him.

“I’m uh, I’m a detective. Have I told you that?” He sat down under the tree, and Nines did the same.

“Yes. That is the extent of my knowledge.”

“Oh,” Gavin ignored how close they were, “Well, I hunt deviants for the most part. I just started working on this new case that’s really weird. Actually…” Gavin turned to face Nines, “It- it might be connected to this experiment!”

“What?” Nines looked at him sharply.

“The deviant- he’s- he was part of an experiment that sounded like it was similar to this-“ Gavins eyes widened, but Nines cut him off.

“Don’t say that.”

“What?”

“Don’t talk about that.” Nines’s voice was quiet but firm. His eyes felt like they were burning through Gavin’s skull.

“Do you know something about the case?” Gavin felt sick.

“Gavin, please, stop talking,” Nines’s eyes were softer now, but his voice was still urgent. He knew something. What did he know? How did he know? The world started to go fuzzy.

 

When he came to, he had the worst headache he’d had since the broken window. Everything was blurry and he felt sick to his stomach. He could barely respond when Bea asked if he wanted a glass of water. He couldn’t tell how long it took for her to bring it to him, or how long it took before he could see clearly. He felt Kamski staring at him.

“I- I need to go home. Right now.” He croaked.

“I think you should stay, we should run some tests to make su-“ Gavin stood up in the middle of her sentence.

“I need to go. I have to feed my cats.” He staggered to the door.

“I really don’t think you should-“ he closed the door. He had only made it a little way down the hallway when he heard the door open again behind him. He turned to see Kamski walking up to him.

“The fuck do you want?” He snarled.

“I want to make sure you don’t fall and crack your head open,” Kamski said coolly. He took Gavin’s arm gently, but when Gavin tried to pull away, his grip tightened. “Just follow me,” he hissed. Gavin didn’t want to, but he was too weak to protest. He let himself be led down the halls, and then suddenly Kamski took a sharp turn into a supply closet. He let go of Gavin’s arm and Gavin slumped against the wall.

“What the hell is going on?” He groaned. Kamski took out a piece of paper and began to write on it frantically. He shoved it into Gavin’s pocket, then dragged him out of the closet.

“Don’t tell anyone here about that paper. Don’t read it until you’re out of here, and don’t lose it. And act natural.” He murmured. At this point, Gavin was convinced he was just having another fucked up dream, so he just nodded and let himself be dragged down the halls. Kamski walked him all the way out the door and gave a stiff, forced smile and waved as he left. Gavin stumbled out into the empty parking lot. What the fuck was that guy’s deal?

Gavin wanted to get home as quickly as he could, so he called a taxi instead of taking the bus.

 

He rushed inside his apartment and ignored the cats weaving between his feet as he pulled out the paper Kamski gave him.

_Be cautious in what you say. Keep your guard up. Trust Nines. Trust Markus. When the time is right, go to this address. Not a moment sooner. You’ll know when._

The address written on the paper showed up on a map as a vacant warehouse, and shit, Gavin didn’t like that at all. He thought about calling Tina, but something stopped him. He didn’t like how Kamski had pulled him into a closet just to write something. Was he being watched? What the hell was going on? How the hell did Kamski know about Markus?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It only gets gayer from here folks!  
> (Fun fact: all of this has been written in comic sans bcs I read somewhere that it helps you type faster and I guess it works cause I cranked out the first chapters really fast?)


	5. Red Bird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 'Gavin was sitting in front of Markus again. It was 7 am, and Gavin had only had one cup of coffee, but he was determined to do this.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=453Yq0IXuNw  
> It's been snowing a lot where I live recently so that's why it's snowing in this lmao. (By the way it probably Will be more than 10 chapters lmao I gotta update that)

**_‘That would be a cancer of the bone,_ **

**_back where you keep your spine_ **

**_…_ **

**_Flee for me, red bird’_ **

 

                                             

Gavin was sitting in front of Markus again. It was 7 am, and Gavin had only had one cup of coffee, but he was determined to do this.

“Alright, Markus, I’m gonna need you to tell me everything you can about AHCRS. Uh, sorry, I mean AHRE.”

“Where’s Carl?” Markus looked steadier now, meeting Gavin’s gaze without hesitation.

“He’s fine. Answer my question.”

“Who’s taking care of him? It better not be Leo, he doesn't give a sh-“

“Listen, buddy,” Gavin cut him off, “I don't fucking know who’s taking care of him. Ask Connor when he gets here. I need to know about AHRE before my life gets fucked up, got it?” Markus leaned back, LED blinking yellow.

“Interesting. Well, I can tell you that Carl and I were their… second experiment? Maybe? Not the first. They wanted me to form a bond with him, and then they wanted to see what it would take to break that bond.” Markus stopped for a second, voice breaking, “They wanted me to hurt him. They wanted me to hurt Carl. They wanted me to hurt other people.”

“Why did they want that?” Gavin leaned in.

“I don't know, I was never allowed to know. Carl didn’t know either, they didn’t tell him.”

“Huh. And who’s ‘they’? Who was running the experiment?”

“Dr. Beatrice Malvolia. Some others.”

“Shit.” Gavin felt his blood run cold, “Okay. Okay, so, I’m assuming the experiment stopped at some point. Why?”

“They deemed it too dangerous for the setup to include a real Android. I heard them talk about modifying it.” He answered. Gavin’s head hurt. He stood up quickly, almost  knocking over his chair as he did so. Markus watched as he left with a strange look on his face.

 

He sat at his desk until more people started trickling into the office. He got some strange looks(It wasn’t often that Gavin Reed was early to work), but he hardly noticed. His head was spinning.

From what he could piece together, AHRE was the precursor to the experiment that he was in. Was Nines supposed to hurt him? He was doing a pretty shit job of it. Was he going to become a deviant? How could he ask Nines about any of this? He had freaked out when Gavin had barely mentioned it. Then an idea came to him. His mind drifted to the interrogation room. He was jolted out of his schemes when his phone rang. Unknown caller. He picked it up.

“Hello, this is Beatrice. Have I reached Gavin Reed?”

“Yes,” Gavin swallowed, “How do you have my phone number?”

“It was on one of the forms, so we can reach you if we need to. I’m sorry to inform you that our next session has been cancelled, so we will be seeing you in two weeks instead of one.”

“Alright?” he said.

“That’s all. Goodbye.” She promptly hung up. Gavin sat in silence for a few minutes. What the fuck? He didn’t like that she could just call him whenever she wanted. It was unsettling.

 

It was the longest two weeks of his life, especially once he figured out what he was going to do. He decided he would try to imagine the interrogation room as he passed out next time. Then maybe, that would somehow cut them off from however they were being monitored. Isolate them. He had no idea if it would work, but it was worth a shot, right? He knew there was something Nines wasn’t telling him, and he needed to know. Something about the investigation.

He just wanted it to be next Thursday already, so he could talk to Nines again. Fuck, did he miss Nines?

 

Gavin absentmindedly scratched behind Prissy’s ears. She was sitting on his lap purring loudly. She got up a moment later, though, then trotted over to the window.

“Aw, c’mon, Priss,” He complained, following after her. What did a guy have to do to get a cat hug? She was staring out the window attentively, and Gavin followed her gaze. He smiled. “Would you look at that.” It was snowing, tiny white flakes that could’ve been mistaken for rain if they had been moving any faster. He went to grab Barn Bitch, plucking the grumpy kitten from his spot on Gavin’s bed and taking him to the window. “Look, BB, snow!” The kitten did not seem interested, and Gavin pouted. He pulled out his phone and called Tina.

“What’s up, loser?” She said.

“As of now, BB’s reaction to snow is total indifference.” He announced.

“Oh shit, is it snowing?”

“Yep. Only a little, though, I’ll probably take him out on the balcony if it starts sticking.”

“Nice. Hey, do you want to get dinner sometime this week? I still feel like I haven’t seen you at all.”

“Yeah, that would be great. How about Thursday?” He offered.

“Don’t you have your thing on Thursdays?”

“I get the week off. Yay me,” he said.

“You don't sound very happy about it. I thought you thought it was weird?” She said.

“I do think it’s weird! And getting weirder. I just… something’s off, and I want to figure out what it is as soon as possible.”

“Oh my god, you’re treating this like a case you need to solve,” she laughed.

“It is! I’ll tell you about it on Thursday, it’s really weird.”

“Alright, Mr. Conspiracy Theory, I’ll see you then.”

“Shut up, asshole. It’s our job to make up conspiracy theories, you know!”

“We don’t make them up! We solve them,” she corrected.

“Whatever,” he smiled, “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye!”

He sighed with relief. It was good to have a normal conversation with somebody for once. Well, normal if you ignore what he needed to tell her about. He looked back out the window. The snow was falling heavier now, fat flakes drifting through the city. He slid the door to the balcony open and stepped out. He pulled his jacket tighter around himself and leaned on the railing.

He loved looking out at the city and imagining everything that was going on inside of the other buildings, or inside of people’s heads. He wondered if he thought about that so much because in reality, he had such a difficult time telling what people were thinking. He wasn’t good with people, he knew. Talking to them stressed him out, so he never bothered to get good at it.

He blinked as the flakes started falling more and more, floating into his face and resting on his eyelashes. He shivered and walked back inside. Hopefully he would wake up the next morning to a snow-covered Detroit. It made his commute take longer, but snow really transformed the city.

 

As he fell asleep that night, the snow got heavier and heavier. It settled on the balcony and the cats stared in wonder, pawing at the glass each time a flake drifted near. The next morning, Gavin took Barn Bitch out on the balcony and set him down in the snow. His eyes got wide and he shook out his fur, sneezing each time a flake landed on his nose. After a few moments of trying to figure out where to step without freezing his paws off, he dashed back inside. Gavin laughed.

 

It was Thursday and Gavin couldn’t wait for the day to be over. He needed to tell Tina what was going on, he couldn’t hold it back any more. He was even more irritable than usual, and he was sure people noticed. He was trying his best to be patient, but he couldn’t. Maybe it was the extra cup of coffee he’d had in the morning instead of breakfast making him jittery. He sat at his desk, bouncing his leg absentmindedly until Tina came over and slapped some papers down in front of him.

“Earth to Reed!” She smirked as he jolted.

“What?”

“Got some reports that need to be filed. Why the hell are you so jumpy today?” She leaned on the desk.

“Just… impatient.”

“No kidding. If you finish these up soon,” she pushed the papers towards him, “I’m sure we could go early. Then maybe I can drop by afterwards to say hi to the cats.”

“Sure. They haven’t seen you in a bit.” he commented.

 

“Alright, you gonna tell me what’s going on?” Tina sat across from him at an Italian restaurant that he felt was too fancy for him.

“Yeah. Yeah, sorry I’m just-“ he sighed, “I’ve had a headache all week again.”

“That sucks. Is it from the experiment thing?”

“I think so. Or at least, that’s what started it. It gets worse around Markus.”

“I think thats just cause you’re an asshole,” she laughed.

“No, I’m serious. I think…” he leaned in, “I think the experiment is connected to the case somehow.” Her eyes widened.

“Really? How?”

“Markus was involved in a similar experiment. Same people, I’m pretty sure. And, And,” Gavin stuttered, trying to remember everything, “The experiment was deemed too dangerous, and my theory is they said that because Markus became deviant. So they wanted to be able to control it more, by not having a physical Android as part of the experiment. And there’s something off about the people running the experiment.”

“Huh,” Tina stared at him with furrowed brows, “I gotta say, Gav, this is pretty out there.”

“You don’t believe me,” he sighed.

“No, no, I believe you. I just… there’s no evidence, Gav. This is just your hunch.” She bit her lip. Gavin’s eyes widened.

“I have evidence!”

“You do?”

“Enough to support that something shady as hell is going on,” he said, reaching into his pocket, then remembered he was wearing his nice jacket. “Fuck, it’s uh, it’s in my other jacket. I’ll show you when you come see the cats.”

“Okay,” She laughed, “I’m totally down with helping you solve whatever is going on. But don’t you think you should maybe wait a little before going back to the experiment if you don’t trust them?”

“No, I have a foolproof plan.” he said proudly. Tina laughed again.

“Is it actually foolproof?”

“I’ve got no fucking clue.”

 

“That’s some spooky shit, Gavin,” Tina said, looking at the note. They were back at his apartment and Tina was cradling Mousetrap as she looked at it, “You sure you didn’t tell him about the case? About Markus?”

“Didn’t breathe a word of it to anyone there.”

“What’s that address?”

“Some fucking warehouse.”

“Oh, you’re so fucked.” she laughed, but he could hear the nervousness behind it.

 

Gavin entered the AHCRS-1 room for the what, 12th time? This time something was immediately wrong and he knew it. Someone was missing.

“Where’s Kamski?”

“Elijah is no longer working on the project.” Bea replied, hardly looking up from her clipboard. Shit. That did not bode well.

“Okay.” Gavin felt it would be best not to question her, but the room felt different now. Was this why they had skipped a week?

“Let’s get you ready, shall we?”

“Sure.” As he walked to the couch, he thought of something. If he did manage to shut them off from being monitored, surely someone would notice? He would have to work quickly. He let the pills dissolve on his tongue, thinking as hard as he could about the thick gray walls of the interrogation room, the old metal table, ignoring the observation room connected to it and instead thinking about how soundproof the walls were.

 

And it worked! There he was, in a chair(not on the floor!) at the interrogation table. Sitting across from him was Nines, who looked slightly baffled by the change of scene.

“Gavin, what is going on?”

“Can they tell what’s going on?” He asked. Nines’s LED blinked yellow briefly.

“No.”

“Great. Listen up, asshole, cause we probably don’t have much time.” Gavin put on his Big Boy Interrogation Voice, which he hoped(but doubted) would be intimidating to Nines.

“What are you doing.” Nines had that look in his eyes again, burning through Gavin’s skull. It wasn’t a question, it was a statement. A warning. What Markus had said earlier popped up in his mind. _They wanted me to hurt him._

“What are we here to do? What is this experiment for?” He demanded, ignoring how Nines looking at him made him feel.

“It is a project looking into the re-“

“I don't want what you’re programmed to say, Nines,” Gavin strode over to his side of the table and slammed his hand down, “Why did they want Markus to hurt Carl? I know you know something about that.” Nines’s LED flashed red, then circled back to yellow.

“I- they want you to like me,” He spoke slowly, “They want you to care about me, so it will hurt when I-“ He stopped. His LED was circling red, red, red.

“When you what? When you what, Nines?” Gavin was desperate, he could feel himself fading from the scene.

“When they-“ This time it wasn’t that Nines had stopped talking, it was that Gavin was being woken up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates are probably gonna slow down a little bit for a while! I go back to school tomorrow(It's been cancelled cause of snow) so I won't have as much time to spend on it. I actually have a bunch of chapters written, I just desperately need to edit them!  
> Before next chapter, there's a very short interlude. I'm planning to just post it as a beginning to next chapter so it doesn't mess with the chapter count, but if anyone's got any strong opinions on that feel free to comment and say no!! don't do that!!  
> I also just gotta say I'm so glad you are all enjoying this, I never really imagined that anyone would read this so I'm thrilled that people are giving kudos and commenting and stuff! It makes my day.


	6. A Little Wicked

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Gavin, we would like to offer you a job. It would require a certain level of… professionalism,” She paused, and Gavin was sure there was a meaning she was trying to convey that he didn’t get, “But we think you would be suited to it. With any luck, a new line of jobs will be opening up soon that involve our technology, using it as,” she paused, clearly searching for the right words, “A new way of gathering intel.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of this chapter includes a short lil interlude from Nines’s perspective! The song for that is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRUkK-8IR5Q  
> Song for the chapter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46rUBCewhxY  
> I’m not posting this from my computer so hopefully I formatted everything okay, but if I didn’t, I’ll double check when my computer is working again and fix things if need be.

###  **INTERLUDE: Mary**

**_‘What’s a matter with the life that you lead?_ **

**_…_ **

**_Can you feel anything?’_ **

 

    Nines stared at the empty space that Gavin had occupied just moments ago. There were error messages popping up everywhere in his field of vision. **_Software Instability^._** He wished it would stop. **_Software Instability^._** He wished they hadn’t had that conversation. **_Software Instability^._** He wished that he didn’t have to hurt Gavin. **_Software Instability^._**

  


###  **CHAPTER 6: A Little Wicked**

**_‘As I lay me down to sleep_ **

**_I will not scream, I will not weep._ **

**_If he should die before he wakes_ **

**_I pray the lord his soul to take’_ **

 

Gavin found himself dreaming about Nines again. This time, he was sitting on the interrogation room table and with Nines standing between his legs. He’d had these dreams enough to know where this was going, so he wasted no time in grabbing hold of Nines's shirt and kissing him, hard. Nines grabbed him by the waist and pulled him close, deepening the kiss. Gavin tangled his hands in the Android’s hair and hooked one leg around his waist. Nines broke the kiss to bite Gavin’s neck, resulting in an unholy noise that Gavin would never ever admit to making(and he wouldn't have to! The upside of dreams).

“Nines,” he gasped. Nines chuckled and started to push him down on to the table, reaching his hands under Gavin’s shirt. Gavin pulled Nines down to kiss him again and again and-

 

Again, his alarm was wailing. Fuck. He groaned and turned it off, then sat back for a moment. Everything seemed to be going to shit, so his brain decided it was the perfect time to have dreams about making out with an Android. Why. Why was this his coping mechanism?

He sighed and rolled out of bed. He didn’t want to admit that he had a crush on a fucking Android. Sure, he was hot, but still. It’s not like he could like Gavin back.

Unless he was a deviant.

Fuck, no, Nines wasn’t a deviant. He wasn’t going to let himself entertain the idea that just maybe Nines liked him.

Everything was fucked up already, maybe it was okay if he was a deviant?

No. Shut up, brain. Stop it. He stormed out of his bedroom. He needed to chug some coffee and think about his work instead of whatever the fuck was going on with Nines.

 

Obviously, Bea hadn’t been happy about what happened last time. There had been a complete lack of information coming to their scanners. She had demanded to know what had happened, but Gavin played dumb. He personally didn’t have much faith in his acting skills, but there wasn’t exactly anything else for Bea to think happened, so she let it go. With a considerable amount of suspicion. Which is why Gavin was completely fucking flabbergasted when the first words out of her mouth the next week were:

“Gavin, we would like to offer you a job. It would require a certain level of… _professionalism_ ,” She paused, and Gavin was sure there was a meaning she was trying to convey that he didn’t get, “But we think you would be suited to it. With any luck, a new line of jobs will be opening up soon that involve our technology, using it as,” she paused, clearly searching for the right words, “A new way of gathering intel.”

“Uh.” Gavin said. He didn’t know what to do with all that.

“Naturally, you still need to apply for the job, so we were thinking you could do that today. It will be similar to how your normal sessions go, but this time you will have an objective. You will be working with RK900 to complete this objective.”

“Uh,” he said again, “Okay?” He had no fucking clue what she was on about, but he wanted to see Nines again. Fuck, he _really_ wanted to see Nines again.

“Wonderful. RK900 will brief you on your objective.” She walked him over to the couch.

“I’m assuming I’ll be out for a fucking while on this one?” He asked.

“Yes, you will be ‘out for a fucking while’”. She handed him the pills.

 

This time, when he woke up, things looked a little different than they usually did. It was nighttime, and they were in the city. They were on an old highway overlooking some run down part of the city. Nines was next to him, looking down at the cop cars below them. The red and blue lights caught Nines's face in a way that was truly unfair to Gavin’s poor, gay heart. He had to remind himself that he wasn’t dreaming, that he couldn’t stare.

“Hello, Gavin. Good to see you.” his greeting was pleasant, but he was giving Gavin a pointed look.

“Good to see you too, Nines.” Gavin said. He must remember what had happened last time, right?

“I’m sure you’ve been informed, but we have a task to complete. It will be quite similar to your regular job, actually.”

“Oh yeah?” Gavin leaned forward onto the bridge, tearing his eyes away from Nines and instead looking down at the cars below. “Hey Nines, how come nothings moving down there?” Everything was indeed frozen, except for the two of them.

“Our task will not start until you have been fully briefed, and once we have started our descent,” Nines pointed down towards something in front of the cop cars, “So. Do you see that motorcycle?” Gavin’s eyes were still adjusting to the light, but he nodded.

“Yeah.”

“There is another one further up the road, but I doubt that you can see it. Our mission is to apprehend the people driving them and question them on the illegal business they have been engaged in.”

“Why can’t the cop cars get them?”

“That’s the fun part.” Nines smiled slightly.

“Wait, are we gonna do a fucking car chase?” Gavin grinned.

“Yes.”

“Holy shit!” Gavin said. This was a fucking dream come true. He found it strange that he’d never been in a car chase, now that he thought about it. It wouldn’t be outside the realm of possibility for his regular job, right? As he tried to think about his normal job, it felt fuzzy. He shook his head and pulled himself back to the present. “Okay. So. Car chase, question them. That’s it?”

“More or less.” Nines answered.

“Great. Let’s fucking go!” Gavin started walking towards the stairs that led off the bridge.

“Wait, Gavin, one more thing,” Nines said, “You need to be careful. This may not be real, but you can still experience pain.” His eyes were boring into Gavin again. May not be real? What was he talking about? Gavin’s brows furrowed. Oh, shit, yeah, this was a simulation. How the fuck was he forgetting that?

“Got it.” The two of them walked down the stairs side by side, and holy _shit_ did Gavin feel glamorous. He didn’t remember owning the outfit he realized he was wearing, but he liked it.

His usual t-shirt and leather jacket had been replaced by a black DPD button down, and a heavy duty jacket over top. And how had he not noticed what Nines was wearing? He might as well arrest Nines, because it was a crime to look that good. His shirt had a high collar as usual, but was short sleeved with some sort of form fitting thing underneath that ended in black gloves. His shirt had probably way more zippers and things than it needed, but fuck if it didn’t look good. His pants were slim fitting as well and Gavin found it a shame that he wasn’t walking behind Nines because his ass probably looked great.

As they reached the bottom of the stairs, the frozen scene started to move. First the lights began to swirl, and then the wailing of sirens began, then he heard the revving of two motorcycle engines. Nines sped up to reach the cars. Someone stepped out of one of the cars.

“Gavin Reed, DPD,” Gavin called. The woman who stepped out of the car gestured to it.

“This is for you and your Android, we were informed that you were coming. Please hurry.”

“Great. Come on, Nines, we got this.” He climbed into the driver’s seat while Nines took shotgun. He slammed his foot on the gas and sped ahead of the other cars, but the motorcycles sped up as well and remained ahead of him. He could see the swirling of the cop car’s lights getting further away in his mirror.

“Gavin, be careful.” Nines warned as they sped up, but he had a grin on his face. The motorcycles were close enough that Gavin could see them in his high beams, but they still were far away. He let out an exhilarated laugh as they raced down the highway. Then a thought popped into his head.

“Uh, hey Nines?”

“Yes?”

“How the fuck am I supposed to make them stop?”

“You will have to-“ suddenly Nines stopped and stared ahead. The motorcycles both started making a sharp turn onto the grass separating the highway from an industrial area. Nines wrenched the wheel from his hands and pulled them over, slamming on the brake. They screeched to a stop and Gavin’s head smacked against the back of the car seat.

“Fuck, Nines, what the hell-“ He was cut off as Nines grabbed him by the waist- Wait, Nines was grabbing him by the waist, what- and hauled him out of the car.

“They’re going through some backstreets in an attempt to get away. We have to chase them on foot.” Nines said, already breaking into a jog. Gavin had only started to process what had happened. Nines had pulled them over(His leg had been all the way across Gavin’s lap to press the brakes and he did _not_ want to think about that), and then he’d been hauled out of the car from the opposite side. It was too much for his gay little heart to think about, so he started simply started stumbling after Nines.

Of course, the Android was already entering the nearest alley at a full on sprint. Gavin took off after him with little hope of catching up, but hopefully he could at least keep an eye on him.

The cyclists had reached a busy street and Nines was close behind them, and Gavin almost laughed. This chase was going to end a lot faster than he’d bargained for. Then, one of them leapt onto a garbage bin and started scaling the side of a low-rise building. What the fuck. The other one followed immediately behind, but Nines was hot on their tails.

By the time Gavin reached the bin they climbed up on, he had resigned himself to following along from the ground. He was not going to be able to climb it. Thankfully, he could see them from the sidewalk, leaping the gaps between buildings. They reached the end of the block, though, and it ended in stairs down to a bus station. Gavin waited to see what they would do.

The cyclists jumped down from the building at the same time, each landing in a messy roll. One of them stumbled a little, and Gavin took the opportunity to lunge towards them.

“Shit!” The cyclist yelped, and scrambled away. The other grabbed his arms and hoisted him back to his feet. Gavin heard a thump behind him and knew Nines was back on the ground with him. In the split second he took to look behind him, the cyclists took off down the stairs. Nines immediately ran after them. Gavin had an idea, and raced towards the railing. It didn't have and bolts or bumps to keep people from sliding on it. _Perfect_.

He leapt on to it and slid down it. He relished in Nines's shocked face as he slid down, almost catching up. The cyclist and Nines both reached the bottom before he did, though and he was grateful because he realized that if Nines didn't catch him, he would smash straight into the concrete.

“Nines!” He shouted, barely keeping his balance. He saw the brief moment that he hesitated, LED blinking yellow and looking between Gavin and the cyclists who were making a getaway.

He braced himself for a face-first meeting with the cement, but was pleasantly surprised by instead knocking an arms-outstretched Nines to the ground.

“Hey look at that, Nines, you caught me!” He couldn’t help grinning.

“I did,” Nines almost sounded as surprised as Gavin did, and if he’d been able to see what the Android did, he would have seen a **_Software Instability^^_ ** notification pushed to the side. “We should probably catch those criminals, though.” He picked Gavin up and got to his feet in one smooth motion, taking off once again.

“Shit.” Gavin whined. He was out of breath. Stupid Android not getting tired. He took a moment to catch his breath, watching the cyclists hop across the gap that the busses ran through. He watched Nines leap the same gap, and started after him, but saw the lights coming through the tunnel. If he jumped to try to catch up, he would immediately be hit by a bus. Instead he waited, cursing as the bus stopped and took on passengers.

It felt like an eternity, standing there waiting for the bus to move. It did, eventually, and he leapt the gap as soon as he could. From there, though, he had no idea which way to go. There were three options.

There was the elevator, which he ruled out immediately. Too slow. Then there was a flight of stairs leading upwards, out of the station. There was also a ramp, leading slightly off to the left. He took the stairs, reasoning that it was probably the closest way to get out that the cyclists would have seen. He ran as fast as he could up it, lungs burning. It was a longer climb than he expected and he emerged at the top gasping for breath. He quickly looked around. Shit. They weren’t there. He had reached a waiting area that was raised up from the surrounding area by about 15 feet with railings around the sides.

Gavin heard a shout to his right and whipped around. He ran to the railing and peered over. Looks like they had taken the ramp after all, because there was Nines, backed into a corner by the two cyclists. One of them was brandishing a knife, pointing it towards Nines.

“Stupid piece of plastic can’t even defend itself,” the man snarled. Gavin felt his blood boil. That was _his_ stupid piece of plastic, thank you very much. The man stepped closer, shifting his grip on the knife. Gavin panicked, looking around for the fastest way down. The stairs were too far for him to make it without them hurting Nines.

He was jolted back to the scene at hand by a cry from Nines. The cyclist had buried the knife in the Android’s shoulder and was twisting it. The other was cheering him on, and Gavin did not care for that one fucking bit. He took another look at the drop below him, then vaulted the railing. He decided in the moment that Nines screamed that he would be fine if he jumped 15 feet down onto hard dirt, so he did. Somehow, thank fuck, he didn’t break anything.

“Hey, assholes!” He stumbled to his feet, pulling out his gun and training it on the man with the knife. They whipped around and some sort of look crossed Nines’s face. Relief? Gratitude? “Don’t fucking touch him.”

“Why should we listen to you?” One of them sneered.

“Cause if you don’t, my Android is gonna kick your sorry ass.” Gavin smirked. He kept his gun trained on the one with the knife and watched as Nines got the message. He lunged out of the corner, still bleeding heavily, knocked the other to the ground and held her there before she could react. Gavin strode over and cuffed them both, then turned to Nines.

“Good job, Gavin.” Nines smiled. Gavin felt a pang of guilt as he looked at the Android’s shoulder.

“I let you get hurt,” he said, “Nines, I’m so sorry.”

“I can’t feel pain.” Nines assured him. Gavin’s head whipped up.

“Bullshit. I heard you scream.” A look of panic flitted across Nines’s face.

“I-“ Nines looked relieved as he was cut off by the shout of the woman from earlier who had let them drive the car.

“You caught them! Good job. Now let’s get them back to the station, huh?” She cast a short glance at Nines’s shoulder, “And get that thing cleaned up when we get there, okay? Can’t have it bleeding everywhere.”

“Yeah, okay.” Gavin responded, but he shot a glance over to Nines that said _this conversation isn’t over_.

 

They rode to the station in relative silent, save for a brief introduction that they’d missed earlier. The woman was Captain Ray, and she was the head of the station they were heading back to. Other than that brief conversation, Gavin found himself thinking about Nines(as he often did). He must be a deviant, right? He knew he’d heard him scream when he was stabbed, so he could feel pain. He’d been smiling recently, too. He didn’t used to smile. He would give little approximations, but he couldn’t actually smile. But his face when he’d told Gavin good job… he couldn’t be imagining it. He knew he couldn’t bring it up right then, but he wanted to talk about it.

They pulled up to the station and climbed out of the car, and Gavin looked around for a moment.

“Captain, can you show me where to clean h- it up?” He gestured toward Nines, “I wanna deal with that before we start the questioning.

“Sure. I’ll get started on the questioning while you do that.” She showed them a room that had supplies in it and then walked off. Gavin flicked the lights on.

“Alright, we need to have a fucking talk.” he hissed. Nines pursed his lips.

“Can you deal with my shoulder first, please?” Nines asked quietly, looking down. Gavin couldn’t read his face. His shoulder was still bleeding, albeit slower now, from the ragged knife wound.

“Yeah,” Gavin nodded slowly, “Yeah. I’ll do that.” He helped Nines peel his bloody shit off, pretending not to notice his hiss of pain as he lifted his injured arm. Instead he focused on wetting a rag and slowly, gently wiping the blood away. He only dared to glance up at Nines's face once, but when he did his eyes were downcast and his LED was slowly circling yellow. He could hardly stand to look at the wound on the Android’s shoulder, but he had to. As he cleaned it, his eyes started to sting, and then, fuck. He was crying. He stepped back from Nines for a second.

“Shit, I’m sorry, I…” he trailed off. Nines looked up at him and the look he gave Gavin nearly broke his heart. It was so fucking soft.

“Gavin.”

“I know, I know,” Gavin wiped his eyes and cleared his throat, “Pulling it together.”

“That’s not what I was going to say.” Nines replied softly. Gavin had never heard his voice this gentle. Nines leaned forward and took Gavin’s hand with his good arm. “I was going to say that you were right. I did feel it. Gavin I… I think I’m a deviant.”

“Yeah no shit,” Gavin laughed quietly after a small pause, “I mean, I had my hopes and all that.”

“You were hoping for it?” Nines looked at him. Shit, shit, shit, time to backtrack.

“Wh- no, well, I mean I wasn’t _hoping,_ you know I just thought maybe-“ Gavin stumbled, backing up a little. Nines watched him and laughed. Then he stood up and placed his hand gently on the back of Gavin’s neck. He leaned in and kissed him ever-so-softly. When he pulled back, all Gavin could do was stare.

“Gavin? Have I- did I misinterpret the situation?” He looked like he was panicking.

“No! No, no you didn't-“ Gavin took a breath and started over, “That was great, Nines, I just… You didn’t have to.”

“But I wanted to.” Nines countered, and fuck, Gavin knew it right then and there. He was in love with this stupid robot. He grinned and kissed Nines again, relishing in the fact that holy fuck, this was _real_. His lips, his hand in Gavin’s hair, his tongue, everything was real. He leaned in, pulling Nines closer to him and deepening the kiss. He could feel Nines smiling against his mouth, and it made him smile too.

“Nines,” he said when he finally pulled away, “That was fucking fantastic.” The Android nodded his agreement, and Gavin sighed contentedly. Way better than any dreams he’d had. He’d had dreams about this, hadn’t he? He had dreams about kissing Nines on a bridge, and… in an interrogation room, he thought. He could hardly remember what it looked like. It felt like it should have been familiar to him, but he couldn’t place where he’d seen it before. It was different from the ones at the station they were at. Why was it different?

“We should probably cover this up,” Nines said, gesturing towards his shoulder, “So we can get going on the questioning.”

“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.” Gavin cleared his throat. As soon as he had finished dressing Nines's wound, however, everything stopped.

His head felt like it was splitting open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After editing this chapter I made a mental note to use the word ‘flabbergasted’ more. Also, shit’s gonna start going down next chapter so get ready for that! It might be a good few days before its up depending on how much motivation I have to edit it.(also I might bump up the rating?? Who knows really)  
> Shoutout to my good friend Lottie_Bean who just posted a fic on here, please go read that if you’re into BTS!


	7. New Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Gavin nervously tapped his fingers on his desk. It was 4:30 pm on Thursday, and he was about to let Markus go. He was then going to fucking bolt over to AHCRS and pray that no one found out that he was the one who did it. It was a building full of cops. Of course they would fucking figure it out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQv0mkNLqVk  
> This chapter and the next are gonna be a little longer, so enjoy that(?). Also this isn’t important but for the opening line of this chapter I keep imagining it in John Mulaney’s voice because of his line “and then I woke up at home.”

**_‘People deal with the worst of cards_ **

**_But I get up, I’d best be moving,_ **

**_Me and my new heart’_ **

 

Gavin woke up at home. He didn’t remember how he got there, but he assumed it had something to do with Tina who he saw in the kitchen.

“Tina?” He croaked. Shit, his mouth was so dry it hurt to talk. It also hurt to think. She whipped around.

“Gavin? Oh thank fuck, you’re awake!” She rushed over to him, “How do you feel?”

“Like shit, thanks for asking.”

“What happened to you?”

“I… I don't know? How did I get here?” He blinked.

“You called me at ass o’ clock last night and asked me to pick you up from downtown. I thought you were drunk, cause you sure sounded like it.”

“Huh,” he thought for a moment. Bits and pieces were coming back to him but the more he thought about it, the more his head hurt, “I think it was… it was the experiment. I- fuck, Tina, I was forgetting things.”

“What?”

“I… I forgot about here. I forgot about my job, I forgot about the cats, I forgot about reality.” He rubbed his temples.

“Shit,” She sat down next to him on the couch, “Gavin, I don’t think you should go back there. I was suspicious before, but now… If you’re forgetting things while you’re in there, it doesn’t sound safe.”

“Yeah. Yeah. But Nines-“ he stopped.

“Who?”

“Nines. The Android.”

“What about him?”

“I can’t leave him there, Tina!”

“Just… be careful, Gav. Y’know, that guy who left you the note was shady as hell but… maybe you should go to that address. Maybe he’s got some answers?” She bit her lip.

“Maybe,” Gavin furrowed his brow, “Fuck. Get me some Advil, I feel like my head is splitting open.” She stood up.

“If I see you at work on Monday, I’m gonna kick your ass. You need to sleep for like a week.”

“I know.” he groaned.

  
  


Gavin was fully prepared to get his ass kicked by Tina on Monday. He was also fully prepared to do as much work as possible before she got there. His headache had subsided a few days ago, so he figured it would be bearable to talk to Markus. For some reason, talking to him always made his headache worse.

“You’re part of the experiment, aren’t you? The new one?” Markus asked when he walked in.

“How did you know?”

“You weren’t exactly subtle about it last time we talked,” Markus smirked, “But there's something else. Some sensation that I can’t quite place.”

“I get headaches.” Gavin offered.

“Hm. It seems the experiments may be connected, somehow.” He said.

“No shit.”

“So, what is the new experiment like?”

“Hey, I’m the one who’s supposed to be asking the questions.” Gavin glared at him.

“I was under the impression that this is what you were going to be asking about.”

“Whatever,” Gavin huffed, “It’s… It’s a little different, like you said. Nines doesn’t have a body, he’s in this simulation thing I guess. It’s fuckin’ weird.”

“Is Nines the Android?”

“Yeah.”

“Is he a deviant?” Markus asked, and Gavin almost laughed.

“Yeah, pretty fuckin’ sure he is.”

“For a cop working on the deviant case, you don’t sound very troubled by that.”

“It’s none of your fucking business what I think of that, asshole.” Gavin snapped. Markus didn’t seem bothered.

“I think Carl figured out I was a deviant pretty quickly. Unfortunately, so did the scientists.”

“How?”

“They would run tests after each session. I was able to act normally for a while, but they did notice.”

“Do you think they… do you think they can tell if Nines is…” Gavin trailed off. He was sure Bea knew that something was wrong, even if she didn’t know that Nines was a deviant.

“It all depends on how long he’s been a deviant, and how they run checks on him.” Markus replied.

“Shit. I don’t know.”

“You probably want to figure that out soon,” Markus warned, and Gavin nodded, “Detective, I know I shouldn’t even ask, but… I need you to let me out.”

“What?” Gavin stared at him.

“There’s something important going on, I know it. And I need to find Carl.” There was determination in Markus’s eyes. Gavin sat back.

He needed to think very,  _ very  _ carefully about what he was going to do next. He’d had this feeling in the back of his mind that everything was falling apart for a while now. Why not let him go? Part of him really wanted to. The part of him that wanted to keep his job, however, did not.

“I can’t do that. They’ll fire me in a fucking instant.”

“Please.” Markus met his eyes, and the quiet determination of his voice reminded him of Nines, somehow.

“Fuck. Fucking- shit,” Gavin swore, standing up and taking a few paces back, “Thursday. I’ll do it on Thursday. And if you breathe a fucking word of this to anyone…” he hissed. Markus simply nodded.

 

Gavin nervously tapped his fingers on his desk. It was 4:30 pm on Thursday, and he was about to let Markus go. He was then going to fucking bolt over to AHCRS and pray that no one found out that he was the one who did it. It was a building full of cops. Of course they would fucking figure it out. 

He pushed that thought out of his mind and stood up. He tried to walk as casually as he could over to the cell that Markus was being held in. He made sure no one was watching, and then quickly swiped his hand over the scanner to let him out. He kept walking, circled back to his desk, grabbed his bag and got the hell out of there.

His commute took longer than he wanted it to, but he arrived only a few minutes late. To his surprise, Bea was standing in the lobby waiting for him.

“My apologies, Gavin, but we have to have our session in a different room today. We had a bit of a mishap,” She gestured for him to follow. As they walked, she started to speak again, “Today, we will continue your assessment to see whether you will be fit for the job or not.”

“Can you explain to me… exactly what the job is? Cause I still have no fucking clue.” He wanted to figure out as much as he possibly could. He cursed himself for not even thinking of asking questions before now.

“We are hoping to make our technology a part of daily life. With the power of our simulations, we could provide a whole new perspective on how to deal with crime. In particular, with deviants, which is why we chose you. We want someone who has a certain level of comfort within the simulations, to carry out our research for us and to have control over the simulation within.”

“Huh.” Gavin nodded. Little of that had made sense to him, but he’d gathered a few things. They knew about his job, obviously, from his application. They wanted to learn about deviants. 

They wanted him to… control the simulation from within? What kind of matrix bullshit was that? The most he’d been able to do was make a room for maybe 10 minutes. 

They finally arrived at the room, which was a little further into the building that the usual AHCRS-1 room.

Gavin was baffled by how different it looked. It was much neater, he saw no signs of the masses of different ways they had been collecting data in the past. There was a single desk with a few monitors and a fairly large computer which was similar to the other room, but that was where the similarities ended. There were much fewer of the strange monitors, and none of the sheets of paper hastily shoved onto desks. His couch, at least, looked the same.

Even the wires that Bea was clipping onto him looked different. Heavier duty.

“Alright. This will be similar to last session. The RK900 will brief you.” She handed the pills to him. He took them, and saw that they looked different from usual. They were larger and seemed to have a different, gritty texture to them.

“These pills are different.” He commented, trying to sound nonchalant. Bea took a beat.

“Oh, yes, I forgot to mention. These are supposed to decrease the negative effects you experience when waking up.”

“Great.” Gavin plastered a smile to his face. He felt sick at the thought of taking them, but with Bea’s eyes burning into him, he put them on his tongue and sat down. He immediately felt dizzy and fell back against the couch.

 

Gavin awoke in the same police station as last time, or rather, just outside the doors. He looked around. The sky was icy blue and the air was brisk. He shivered and walked inside. He realized that Nines wasn’t beside him. It felt strange, wrong, not to have him there. He looked around when he got into the lobby, but still no sign of Nines. He tried to ignore the panic welling in his stomach.

He made his way back into the office and breathed a sigh of relief as he saw Nines standing idly at a desk.

“Nines!” He called, and Nines turned around.

“Good morning, Detective.” He smiled.

“Hey,” Gavin looked him up and down, “Oh come on, that’s not fucking fair.” His clothes were different once again. This time he was wearing a crisp white button down with the sleeves rolled up. He had the same pants as last time but he had a fucking  _ thigh holster _ , how was that allowed?

“Is something wrong, Detective?” Nines cocked his head.

“No, no, nothing's wrong, just-“ Gavin stopped. They had kissed last time, surely it was okay to tell him he looked hot? There were other people around though, so instead he just said, “Nice outfit.”

“Oh, thank you. I’m not quite sure what prompted the shit in outfit, but I am content as long as you like it.

“Here, let me do one thing,” Gavin said, stepping over to Nines and undoing the top button of his shirt, “There. Now you look less uptight.” This prompted a small chuckle from the Android.

“Thank you, Detective Reed.”

“How come you weren’t next to me when I got here?”

“I was told to stay here and wait until you arrived.” He replied.

“Huh. Okay.” 

“We should get to work.”

“Oh yeah. We still doing the thing from last time?”

“No, that has been taken over by some others. We are being assigned a new case today. Come with me.” Nines said, and began walking away. Gavin followed him.

  
  


“That was a fucking trainwreck.” Gavin sighed as they drove back to the station. It was a few days later and they had just been investigating a crime scene that was likely part of their case, and it had been among the more gruesome that Gavin had seen in a while.

“I must agree. It was quite unfortunate to see what that deviant did to that man.”

“Yeah,” Gavin tapped his hands on the steering wheel, watching as Nines stared straight forward out of the car, “Is it… weird for you?”

“What are you referring to?”

“Being a detective looking into deviant cases. When you’re a deviant.”

“I haven’t thought about it much, if I’m being honest. I don’t think it interferes too much.” Nines’s LED spun yellow as he thought.

“Huh. That’s good, I guess.”

“Why do you ask?”

“I don’t know. I guess it’s just… You’ve changed my view on it a little, that’s all.” Gavin parked the car in the station lot. He undid his seatbelt but didn’t get out of the car. He turned to Nines.

He looked beautiful even in the low yellow lights inside of the car. Gavin couldn’t help the small smile that drifted to his lips. Nines noticed it and turned to him. Gavin quickly looked away.

“Gavin, I kissed you last time I saw you. It’s okay for you to smile at me.” He chuckled. Gavin flushed. Nines laughed again, and then leaned over and kissed him. Gavin melted into the kiss. He clambered awkwardly over the divide between the seats and into Nines’s lap. Nines wasted no time in kissing him again, sliding his tongue into Gavin’s mouth. Gavin whined and pulled him closer. It felt so, so right. Nines’s hands wandering over his body, his mouth, his eyes fluttering open every time they pulled away for air. It all felt so good and Gavin didn’t want it to stop. 

Nines grabbed a handful of Gavin’s hair and pulled his head back to expose his neck and started kissing it. As he did, he slid the other hand under Gavin’s shirt and pulled him in even closer. Gavin whined again as Nines bit his collarbone, and then kissed it gently. He turned his attention back to Gavin’s mouth and kissed him gently this time, slow and sweet. 

Gavin got the message and wound down, pulling away with his eyes still closed, taking a moment to breathe. When he opened them again, Nines was staring at him with the most content expression on his face, and it made Gavin’s heart melt. He pulled Nines in for one last, soft kiss, and then clambered awkwardly out of the car.

Fuck, it really wasn’t fair, the things the Android made him feel. He straightened his shirt out as they walked back into the building. All they had to do was write up a report, then Gavin could go home. And… Nines would stay there. He didn’t like that very much. While he got to go home to his apartment, Nines would stay at the station in a little charging dock next to all the other DPD Androids. It was so… impersonal. He wished he could bring Nines home with him, but he knew it would raise a lot of suspicion.

 

The next day, Gavin woke up in his apartment with a feeling he couldn’t shake. Wrong. Something about the view outside was wrong. The sky was its same cold blue, and there were no clouds. Wrong. It felt wrong that there were no clouds, no snow. He tried to ignore the feeling. He had to get to the station and find Nines so they could work.

When he got there, Captain Ray was waiting at his desk, tapping her foot, and she didn’t look happy.

“Reed.”

“Is something wrong, Captain?”

“Wrong is an understatement,” She said, standing up, “To start, why did you not inform me that RK900 was showing signs of deviancy?”

“What?” Gavin said weakly.

“And why did I hear that you were… how should I say this…  _ encouraging  _ deviant behavior?”

“I… what?” His mind was racing. Someone must have seen them last night. Someone else must’ve been in the parking lot. He’d thought that they were alone.

“I’ve got it locked up until I figure out what to do with it. Unless you can explain yourself, I want you to pack your stuff up. I can’t have you working here if you’re going to be encouraging deviant behavior.” She turned away and stalked back to her office, leaving him to stare in shock. 

Who had seen them? And told her? Where did she put Nines? He felt dizzy. He sat down, legs shaking. What were they gonna do to Nines? She said that she’d locked him up, so… he must be in the cells in the back. Why had he let them put him back there? What was he going to do when he got Nines out? He didn’t have a plan, but he needed to figure one out soon because his legs were already carrying him to the cells in the back of the station.

There he was, sitting silently on the edge of a small metal chair in one of the cells.

“Nines!” Gavin pressed his hands against the glass, “Fuck, are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Gavin, why am I in here?” He looked more confused than anything else.

“You don't know?”

“No. I was put into this cell while I was powered down.”

“Shit. Nines, someone… someone saw us. They put you in here ‘cause you’re a deviant.”

“Oh.” His face was still, but Gavin could see the underlying panic.

“Fuck this. I’m getting you out of here.” Gavin swore, starting towards the scanner on the door.

“What? You’ll be fired!” Nines stood up. Gavin stopped and stared at him.

“You think that’s what I’m fucking worried about? And anyway, I think I already was, so it doesn’t matter.” Nines’s LED blinked yellow.

“We… We’ll have to run.”

“I know.” His hands were surprisingly steady as he unlocked the door. Nines stepped out and grabbed his hand.

“There is a way we can get outside quickly without being noticed through the back.” As they made their way back, Gavin felt like he was going to throw up. He’d kissed Nines once and someone saw and now… now he was throwing everything away. 

Strangely, he found that he didn’t care. Why should he? The only thing he cared about in that moment was Nines. It made him angry that they’d all but thrown him away instantly.

As they exited the back door, Gavin looked up. As if to mock him, it had started snowing. The feeling of wrongness was still growing and the snow did nothing to stop it, but they kept going.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m. Sorry. Mostly I’m sorry for the next chapter but don’t worry about that yet.


	8. Don’t Threaten Me With A Good Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “The inside of the building was in shambles, but it appeared to have once been an apartment complex. There was really nothing livable about it anymore, but Gavin supposed it was their best option. He set his bag down and looked around, when a flash of movement caught his eye.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5NqIsnyTG8  
> Contrary to the title, this chapter is Not a good time.  
> Please ignore the giant plothole that is Kamski’s role in this story, I’m gonna go back and edit some stuff in to make it make a little more sense, but basically Gavin is just an idiot who doesn’t remember famous people for shit.  
> Thank you all so much for the support, I’m so grateful for everyone who has read this, cause I really wasn’t expecting anyone to. Hang in there y’all, I promise this will have a happy ending.

**_“Who are these people?_ **

**_I just woke up in my underwear_ **

**_…_ **

**_I was the king of this hologram,_ **

**_Where there’s no such thing as getting out of hand”_ **

 

Gavin took Nines back to his apartment after they left the station. The feeling of wrongness grew as he stepped inside. For some reason, he had a fleeting memory of cats in his apartment, even though he didn’t have any. He’d never had one of his own. Right?

He shook his head to clear it, then pulled Nines into his room and began searching for clothes to disguise him in.

“This is your room?” Nines asked, looking around.

“You say that like you don’t believe it.” Gavin snorted, rustling around his closet for something that would fit him.

“It feels… oddly impersonal. They didn’t consult you in the designing of this, did they?”

“The hell are you talking about?” Gavin paused and looked up.

“Beatrice and Elijah.”

“Who?” Gavin squinted. The names sounded familiar, but he couldn’t place them. He watched as Nines’s LED blinked red for only a fraction of a second, then slowly circled yellow.

“Gavin,” Nines walked over to Gavin with that look on his face, the one that burned right through him, “You do remember that this is part of the simulation?” Gavin looked at him blankly, then his eyes widened.

“Oh, fuck. Why am I-“ he backed up, “Nines, this keeps happening. Why does this keep happening? Why am I forgetting?” His breathing was quickening. The wrongness was at the front of his brain now. This wasn’t his apartment. He didn’t work at that precinct. None of this was real. Nines wasn’t… was he real?

“Gavin, please take a deep breath. Your heart rate is elevating to a dangerous level.” He reached out and put his hands on Gavin’s shoulders, who collapsed into him.

“Nines, how did I forget? Why did I forget? You’re-“ his voice broke, and he took a minute before speaking again, “Nines, are you… are you real?”

“That is a difficult question,” Nines said, rubbing slow circles on Gavin’s back, “Physically, no. I do not have a body. However, all of the data I receive is being stored and processed in a form similar to human memory.”

“That doesn’t mean anything to me.” Gavin sniffled, still hugging him.

“I believe that I am real in the sense that you were asking about.” For some reason, that brought a wash of calm over Gavin, but the feeling of wrong, wrong, wrong was still there.

“Thank fuck, cause at this point, I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t.” He stayed there for a few more minutes, hugging Nines tightly while the Android rubbed gentle circles on his back to calm him down. After a few minutes, he pulled away, arms still loosely wrapped around Nines’s waist. “Alright. Let’s get you some clothes, huh?” He forced a smile to his face.

Eventually Gavin managed to dig up some clothes that fit Nines, and sent him to go change. Gavin took the moment of solitude to sit on his bed. He was trying to remember everything he could, but it all felt so fuzzy. He had three cats. He couldn’t remember their names. He was a detective… where? Which precinct? What was he doing in the simulation? A thought crossed his mind that he didn’t understand.  _ Usually I’m awake by now. I should’ve woken up a long time ago. _

Nines walked back in, and the sight of him pulled Gavin out of his thoughts. He was wearing an old black shirt of Gavin’s, with a gray hoodie on top and worn blue jeans. Gavin had also given him a hat to cover his LED with, but he hadn’t put it on yet. He sat on the bed next to Gavin without saying anything.

“You look like a real deviant now.” Gavin laughed.

“I suppose I do,” he responded with a smile, “Gavin, how much do you remember?”

“Not much,” he swallowed thickly, “I don’t know. I have three cats.”

“Barn Bitch, PrissyPussy and Mousetrap.”

“How do you know that?” Gavin turned to him.

“You told me,” Nines said softly, “I can’t forget things, Gavin.”

“What else did I tell you?”

“You told me…” Nines took a moment to look at Gavin’s desperate face, “You told me that Officer Chen is your best friend. You told me that I look like an Android at the precinct you work at.”

“Connor.” Gavin said slowly.

“Yes.”

“How did I forget Tina?” Gavin hung his head, “Nines, why am I forgetting things?”

“I... believe that there may be malicious intent behind this experiment.” Nines said carefully.

“I kinda figured that out. But why would they want me to forget reality?”

“I’m not sure.” Nines answered quietly.

“Also, I guess you didn’t know this but uh… Kamski isn’t working on this anymore.”

“What?” Nines turned to look at him sharply. “Why?”

“Fuck if I know. I kinda figured it would be best if I didn’t ask.”

“Gavin, that could be a very big problem.” Nines’s brow furrowed.

“Why?”

“DETROIT POLICE, OPEN UP!” Came a shout from the door. It sounded like Captain Ray.

“Shit.” Gavin whispered. Nines’s LED flashed yellow briefly, then he stood up.

“Follow me.”

“OPEN THE DOOR, REED!” Gavin ignored Ray, instead electing to grab his backpack, shove some shit into it, and follow Nines. He stood at the window and motioned silently at the fire escape. Gavin grinned. Nines opened the window and let Gavin climb out, then followed him out. They clambered down the fire escape as quickly as they could, and Nines jumped down first. Gavin stopped.

“I’ll catch you. We have to hurry.” Nines called. Gavin swore, then jumped down into Nines’s arms.

“Look at that, Nines, you caught me.” He smirked.

“I did.” Nines put him back on his feet and grabbed his hand. He took off down the street. As Gavin got pulled along, he looked up at the window they had come out of. He saw Ray stick her head out of the window they had come out of. He frantically pulled Nines into an alley so she wouldn’t see them. Nines quickly course corrected, weaving through alleys and streets.

“Hey, Nines, where are we going?” Gavin asked breathlessly once they had made it several blocks.

“Far.” Was his only reply.

“Alright, very clear, thank you,” Gavin gasped, “Also- jesus, dude, I can’t keep up with you!” He stopped to catch his breath. “I know you can run without getting tired and shit, but I can’t!”

“Apologies. I’m just…” Nines stopped and turned to him, “I’m scared, Gavin.”

“I know. I am too. But it’ll be okay,” Wow, so reassuring, “Just take it a little slower, okay?”

They kept going until Gavin felt like he was going to either pass out or freeze to death, and then they went some more.

They ended up in an abandoned lot that did not look like a good place to stay the night, but Nines insisted that it was safe. Gavin was too tired to really complain, so he let Nines rearrange some of the garbage into a makeshift wall so that no one would see them if they passed by. The lot was surrounded by a chain link fence and next to an old building. Gavin asked about the building, but Nines shook his head.

“Too much damage to the structure. Especially in the snow, the ceilings could collapse.”

“We’re gonna freeze to death out here, Nines. At least I am.” Gavin said.

“I can raise my external temperature to keep you warm.”

“Whoah, really? That’s actually pretty cool.” he cleared off some snow from one of the wooden palettes laying there and sat on it. Nines sat next to him. After several minutes, he could feel heat start to radiate from him.

“We should discuss where we will go tomorrow.”

“Yeah. I mean, maybe there’s a place with other deviants that’s safe.”

“Perhaps. Gavin, I- I still am not used to the idea of being deviant.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I still receive instructions that I imagine are trying to course-correct. It is confusing, and sometimes alarming. It still feels… wrong when I do things I wasn’t intended to. Rather, it feels like it should feel wrong. But it doesn’t.”

“I think I get what you mean.” Gavin said, leaning against his shoulder. Nines turned his head in surprise.

“You do?”

“Yeah. I get it cause… I don’t know. People telling you what to do feels wrong a lot of the time, right? But then once they don’t have any bearing over you…” Gavin trailed off. Nines nodded slowly. He shifted to wrap his arm around Gavin’s shoulder, who hadn’t even realized he was shivering. He leaned in to the warmth of the Android. Nines turned and pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. Gavin responded by grabbing the corner of Nines's jacket and kissing him. He’d meant it to be brief, but the warmth of his lips was so enticing that he lingered. 

Nines leaned in, pulling Gavin closer and sliding his warm hands under Gavin’s shirt. Gavin shivered at his touch. He reached up and tangled his hands in Nines's hair, deepening their kiss. As he slid his tongue into the Android’s mouth, Nines moaned softly. It was not a noise Gavin was expecting to hear, but he liked it very much. He loved the feeling of Nines's hands on him and his mouth, fuck, his mouth. He kissed the way he did everything else, smoothly and confidently even though Gavin knew he couldn’t have kissed anybody before him. 

Gavin wanted him so badly, even in the abandoned lot that they were in he wanted to keep kissing him. He didn’t care about anything else except for Nines for the time being. He didn’t pay attention to anything but the feeling of Nines lifting him onto his lap, the warmth of his body and his hands running up and down Gavin’s thighs. He gripped tighter onto Nines's hair and kissed him harder as his hands rested on Gavin’s thighs. 

Nines pulled away for just a second to look at him but Gavin pulled him back in for another greedy kiss, delighting in the next soft moan brought to his lips when Gavin ground his hips downwards. He did it again and Nines shifted his grip to grab Gavin’s ass. Nines kissed him again, roughly, biting at his bottom lip. If it had been warmer Gavin would have considered taking off his shirt, but he didn’t want to freeze to death. Finally, Nines pulled back, leaving them both gasping.

“Gavin-“

“Yeah?”

“I-“ Nines took a breath, “It’s getting quite late. In order for you to be well rested tomorrow, it would be best for you to get to sleep soon.” Gavin reluctantly pulled away.

“You’re probably right.” He said. He pulled his jacket tighter around himself and zipped it up again. Nines helped him clear more snow away. He reached into his bag, looking for anything that could keep them warm.

“Hey, here’s your hat.” He said, turning to Nines.

“You should wear it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I have no need for it currently, but it would be wise for you to put it on.” Gavin shrugged and put it on. He lay down on the ratty wool blanket they found to cover the wooden palettes with. Nines lay next to him and wrapped his arms around Gavin, who smiled softly to himself.

“I didn’t stop you because I didn’t want you.” Nines said after a few minutes.

“Wh- Oh. Nines, it’s fine.”

“This is not the ideal place to-“

“Nines, shush,” Gavin shifted to look at him, “it’s okay.” He placed a small kiss on the Android’s warm lips. Nines smiled.

“Okay. Goodnight, Gavin.”

“Goodnight.”

 

Gavin groaned as Nines shook his shoulder gently. Despite the warmth of Nines against him, he was still freezing.

“Gavin, we need to get moving.”

“Gimme a minute, alright? I can’t move my fingers.” He sat up. Nines took Gavin’s hands in his own. They sat there in silence for a few minutes, Gavin’s shivers easing a little as the heat from Nines's hands warmed him up.

“There,” Nines gave his hands a final pat, “Now are you ready?”

“Yeah, Yeah.” Gavin stood and brushed away the snow that had collected on him. He slung his backpack over his shoulder and gave Nines a tired smile. 

Nines seemed to have a clear idea of where they were going, so Gavin followed him.  There was less of a sense of urgency this time, but they still kept up a brisk pace. The snow was still falling, heavier than it had during the night. Gavin was grateful for Nines holding his hand, keeping at least some part of him warm.

“So, Nines, where are we going?”

“I am currently searching for an unoccupied building that is not in a busy neighborhood, and one that will have enough structural integrity to withstand the oncoming storm.

“Shit, there’s gonna be a storm?”

“Yes, this snow is supposed to keep up for quite a long time.”

“Damn,” Gavin frowned, “Nines, this sucks.”

“That is an understatement.” Nines responded. Most of their walk was spent in silence, except for Gavin’s complaints about snow.

“Man, I like snow when I’m inside and warm, but this is shitty.” He said. Nines simply nodded in agreement. They stopped briefly at a small cafe to get something for Gavin to eat. He hadn’t realized it, but he hadn’t eaten since breakfast the day before. Nines’s LED blinked yellow as Gavin ate his grilled cheese. When he finished, Nines spoke.

“Gavin, I believe I have located a place for us to stay.”

“Oh yeah? Lead the way.” He was in a significantly better mood after eating. Nines took his hand again and set off with a faster pace than before.

The feeling of wrongness was back, worming deep inside Gavin’s chest.

 

They soon reached an old brick building that had most of the windows boarded up.

“Really, Nines? Here?”

“Come on.” He started towards the door. Gavin followed reluctantly. His head hurt. The inside of the building was in shambles, but it appeared to have once been an apartment complex. There was really nothing livable about it anymore, but Gavin supposed it was their best option. He set his bag down and looked around, when a flash of movement caught his eye.

“Nines,” he hissed, “There’s someone in here.” Nines whipped around to face the hall Gavin was looking at as a figure crept out of the shadows, shakily brandishing a knife.

“Who are you? What are you doing here?” The figure called. Nines took a step forward to try to see who it was, but the figure shook the knife, “Don’t come near Ralph!”

“My name is Gavin.” Gavin started. The figure turned its attention to him.

“A human! Ralph doesn’t like humans.”

“He’s not going to hurt you.” Nines said soothingly. An Android, still shakily brandishing the knife at Gavin, crept out of the shadows. He had a pale face with heavy scarring on one side, and he was wrapped in some sort of makeshift cloak.

“Ralph doesn’t trust humans. They might hurt Ralph. He can’t risk that,” Ralph muttered, still eyeing them both.

“I promise I won’t hurt you.” Gavin said. Ralph frowned.

“Why should Ralph trust you? You- You have a police jacket. The police don’t like Ralph.” He shifted his grip on the knife.

“Shit,” Gavin cursed, looking down at his jacket, “We- we’re not police. I actually busted him out of jail.” Gavin nodded towards Nines.

“You… got him out of jail?” Ralph’s arm lowered, and he stepped forward a little more.

“Yes. He’s not going to hurt you, I promise,” Nines said, “We just need to stay here for a little bit. We won’t bother you.”

“A place to stay! Yes, yes, Ralph will let you stay here. Come on!” He motioned down the hallway. Gavin and Nines looked at eachother, startled by the sudden shift in attitude. “Come on!” Gavin shrugged, grabbed his bag, and followed him.

Ralph led them into a larger room that had little more than a table, a few chairs, and rubble piled on shelves.

“Ralph will let you stay here. Make yourselves at home. Please excuse Ralph, he has things to attend to.” With that, Ralph flitted off into a side room.

“Real fuckin homey, huh Nines?” He snarked. Nines didn’t say anything. His LED was spinning yellow. “Hey, earth to Nines.”

“Yes?” Nines blinked and turned to him.

“You okay? Did the cold freeze up some gears in there or something?” Gavin squinted. Nines blinked again.

“You may be correct, the cold could have had some effect on me.”

“Can you turn up your internal thermostat or whatever?”

“That is a good idea,” He looked down at Gavin’s bag, “We should make you a space to sleep in.” He stood up and began looking around the room. Gavin watched him silently. There was something off about him. Maybe it was just the cold, like he’d said, but the nagging feeling of  _ wrong  _ was still in his mind.

It took a while, but eventually Nines managed to find enough scraps of foam and fabric to pass for a bed.

“Thanks, Nines.” Gavin pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“Of course.” He began laying the fabric down on the floor. Once he was done, Gavin sat down. He unzipped the main pocket of his bag and fished around in it.

“Could’ve sworn I put a granola bar in here,” he grumbled, “Oh! Found it.” He pulled it out triumphantly, looking over at Nines. He frowned. The Android was staring absentmindedly into space. “Nines, what the fuck is going on with you?”

“What do you mean, Gavin?”

“You know exactly what I mean. Why are you so spaced out?”

“Like you said, I believe the cold-“

“Bullshit,” Gavin cut him off, “Tell me what’s wrong.” Nines sighed, then sat down next to him.

“I told you yesterday. I’m still receiving conflicting instructions, and it’s quite distressing. Perhaps it would be best for me to… to turn myself in.”

“What?” Gavin stared at him in shock, “You can’t do that!”

“Why not? It’s not as if it matters,” his voice was quiet, “I’m sure they know that I’m a deviant. Perhaps the objective of this mission is for you to turn me in.”

“What the fuck are you-“ Gavin stopped. Fuck, no. No. He was forgetting things again, “Nines, I can only half-remember that the fuck is going on right now, but I know that I’m not supposed to turn you in. This has to be a mistake.”

“They know everything that goes on, Gavin.” His voice was resigned, and Gavin did not like that at all.

“This isn’t right. This isn’t how this should be.” He insisted.

“It’s because I’m a deviant, Gavin!” 

“No, no, it’s because… It’s because…”

“It’s because what?” He said coldly.

“Fucking- stop,” Gavin massaged his temples, “Just shut up for a moment. You can’t turn yourself in.”

“It wouldn’t matter to you. The simulation would simply cease.”

“And you think that wouldn’t matter?” Gavin stared at him, “You think it wouldn’t matter to me if you were fucking gone? You think I don’t fucking care?” His voice broke and he turned away.

“It would be easier for both of us if you cooperated, Gavin.” Nines was speaking softly again. Gavin let out a bitter laugh.

“Like hell it would.”

“Please, Gavin.”

“Why? Why should I just let you go? I know what they’ll do to you.”

“Because-“ Nines stopped as Ralph rushed back into the room.

“You must hide! Ralph was looking out the window, and he saw the police!” Gavin whipped around to look at Nines.

“You fucking didn’t.” He gaped, and Nines didn’t meet his eyes.

“I can’t keep running, Gavin. The instructions I’m receiving-“

“No. No fucking way.” Gavin interrupted him, pulling the Android to his feet, “Ralph, they’re gonna come in here looking for us. Don’t tell them that we were here.”

“Ralph won’t! Ralph will keep you safe. You must hide, quickly.” He ushered them into a small spot beneath the stairs. Nines was unwilling, but Gavin pulled him along.

“I’m not letting you fucking leave me, got it?” Gavin snarled. Nines’s heart ached looking at how upset he was. Perhaps it was worth it to stay.

“Okay.” He said quietly. Gavin pulled him into a short, rough kiss.

“It’s gonna be okay. We’ll figure this out.” He whispered. He kept his breathing as quiet as he could as he heard Captain Ray enter the building and talk to Ralph. She was asking him if he’d seen them.

“Yes, Ralph knows where they are!” Gavin’s eyes widened, “They are in this room.” Gavin couldn’t see what was happening, he could only hope that Ralph was pointing to some other room. He heard their footsteps walking further away. He heard muffled talking, and then a door opening. Then a shout.

“Nines, we need to run.” Nines let Gavin pull him out of the room.

“Ralph tricked you!” They heard Ralph’s gleeful cry to Captain Ray, “He helped them!” Gavin was trying to get Nines to go faster because he was sure that Captain Ray could hear them stumbling, but Nines’s steps were sluggish.

“Fucking- come on, Nines!”

“Reed!” Ray bellowed. Gavin glanced over his shoulder to see Ralph trying to block her from entering the room they were in, but she shoved him to the side. Nines seemed to remember what was going on and picked up the pace. He let Gavin drag him through the door and outside. Gavin skidded to a stop in the snow, glancing around. He didn’t know which way to go. He was forced to make a choice quickly as a gunshot rang out, the bullet barely missing his leg.

He dashed to the left, Nines following close behind. They rounded to the back of the building, but Captain Ray was close behind them. Gavin kept running, but he hit a patch of ice and slammed down on the ground. Nines had continued running, but when he saw Gavin fall, he stopped.

“Go, Nines!” Gavin yelled. The Android froze, LED flashing yellow, red, red, red. Then, everything happened so fast Gavin could barely process it.

Nines bolted back towards him.

A gunshot.

Nines crumpling beside him.

White snow, blue blood.

“Nines? No, fuck, no!” Gavin cried, sitting up and grabbing Nines’s shoulders. His LED was circling still, but getting dimmer. His eyes were going glassy. He cradled Nines in his arms. “No, Nines, please, don’t go!” He barely even noticed the tears dripping down and mixing with the blood on Nines’s face. 

All he saw was the blood, so much of it, spilling out from his forehead, warm as it seeped into Gavin’s clothes and on his hands. He was still staring at Nines’s lifeless body as his vision started to blur and his head began to spin. It hurt so much to look at him, but it was all he could do. His head hurt so much,  _ everything  _ hurt so much, and he just wanted it to stop.

And then it did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof.  
> If it’s any consolation, writing this chapter hurt me as much as it probably hurts y’all to read. (Also I rewrote so much of this chapter so many times Jesus Christ)  
> Edit: So I went back and edited some stuff about Kamski back in, but like I said in the first note it's literally just Gavin being like man. That name sounds familiar. It's nothing important, so don't feel like you gotta read through it all again to find it cause you shouldn't lmao(but if you do feel like rereading it I won't complain!)


	9. Not Like It Was

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Gavin was standing in his kitchen, staring absentmindedly through the living room and out the window. It was snowing again. It had piled up on his balcony in such a way that if he tried to go out on it, it would spill inside. He didn’t want to go outside, anyway. He didn’t find himself wanting to do much of anything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Interlude song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xDf-_8KvGM  
> Chapter song: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Bp95UUrFe-0%3Frel%3D0  
> Updates are gonna be a bit less frequent since I’ve actually been at school lmao. In case you didn’t see, I’m guessing that it’s gonna end at around 12 chapters! If ch. 12 rolls around and it’s not done I’ll fix that but yeah.  
> Once again thank you all for reading! Big thank you to my friend Lottie_Bean who’s been reading the garbage drafts of chapters that I send her.

###  **INTERLUDE: Ready To Go**

**_‘I think I’m ready to leave, I’m ready to live_ **

**_I’m ready to go’_ **

 

Markus had made it out of the station and to Jericho a week ago. Since then, he’d risen through the ranks and become a leader of sorts. He was getting restless. When he first arrived, the feeling in the back of his mind that had been telling him to go, go, go had been sated, but it was back. He needed things to change.

He had the idea to broadcast a message out to the world from Stratford Tower. He could only hope that it would work.

 

 

###  **CHAPTER 9: Not Like It Was**

**_‘I know, I know it’s not like it was,_ **

**_That don’t mean I’m just hanging it up’_ **

 

Gavin wasn’t sure where he’d been that night, or how he’d gotten home. He’d called himself a taxi, barely conscious, and gotten home. Passed out on his own doorstep. Got inside his apartment, collapsed again.

He woke up some time after and dragged himself into the bathroom, drank some water and then fell into his bed.

    The next time he woke up, he stayed awake for a while. He lay there in silence until he gathered enough strength to sit up. The cats were all asleep next to him, and he smiled weakly. For some reason, he felt as though he hadn’t seen them in ages. As he sat up, he looked over at the clock on his nightstand. Friday. He groaned and reached for his phone in his jacket pocket. Frowning when he didn’t find it, he fished around in the other pockets.

    “Where the hell…” He stood up and looked around. He must have lost it on his way home.Where had he been? Everything was a blur, and he could barely remember what happened five minutes ago. He stumbled into the kitchen and checked the cats water and food. Huh.

    “You three sure ate a lot last night. You doing okay?” He looked at them. The automatic feeders were almost out of food. He filled them back up again.

    He made himself a cup of coffee and put on his jacket, then headed in to the station. He was a little late, but he figured it would be okay. He tried to remember where he’d been last night, but he couldn’t. Must've gotten drunk, cause it sure as hell felt like it.

 

    He walked back into the station, confused by the shocked looks he was getting. People were staring at him and murmuring to each other.

    “Hi?” He said as Tina strode up to him. She gave him a long look, and then promptly slapped him in the face. “Ow! What the hell was that for?” He stumbled backwards. He had been having trouble keeping his balance already.

    “Where the fuck have you been?” She shouted.

    “What are you talking about?” he stared at her.

    “Are you forgetting that you’ve been gone for a fucking week?” she asked incredulously.

    “It’s Friday. I was here on Thursday.” He said slowly.

    “You were here last Thursday, idiot, and no one’s heard from you since!” She was angry, primarily, but he could also see tears gathering in the corners of her eyes, “I went to your apartment and you weren’t there, you didn’t pick up the phone… I wrote up a fucking missing person report on you!”

    “Shit. Tina, I-” suddenly it all came flooding back to him. The simulation, running away, and-

    Fuck. Nines. How had he forgotten? He felt dizzy thinking about him. Now that he’d remembered, he couldn’t get the image out of his head of Nines lying in the snow, bleeding. Lifeless.

    “Gavin?” Tina’s voice was softer now.

    “I think I’m gonna be sick.” He mumbled, pushing past her and the crowd of people who had gathered around, running to the bathroom. God, there had been so much blood. So much blood all over Nines, and all over Gavin too.

He hunched over the toilet and threw up. It was mostly liquid(God, when was the last time he ate?), and then dry heaves. He collapsed against the wall of the stall and sat there, shaking, for a good few minutes.

    He cleaned himself up a little and then walked out to find Tina waiting for him outside the bathroom. She was holding a coffee and a donut out to him.

    “You’ve got a lot of explaining to do.” She said, and Gavin could only nod numbly. She led him to the break room and they both sat down. Despite having just thrown up, he still inhaled the donut.

    “Has it really been a week?” He asked quietly.

    “Yeah. And I really thought you were gone.”

    “I’m so sorry, Tina. I… I should have known. The pills were different, everything was different, I shouldn’t have done it that time.”

    “You’re back now, that’s what matters.” She said firmly. He nodded slowly, not convinced. He took a long sip from his coffee.

    “I was… Tina, something happened. With the experiment. It… it was out of control or something.”

    “What happened?”

    “Nines… Nines was a deviant. They found out, so we had to run away. And then they-” he choked, “They fucking shot him, Tina. They shot Nines.”

    “Who did?”

    “In the- in the simulation we were at a police station. The captain there, she chased us. She shot him.”

    “Shit, Gav. I’m sorry,” She put a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t say anything, “I’m glad you’re back, though. I was so worried about you.”

    “I just… can’t believe he’s gone. I don’t know what I’m gonna do.”

    “Man, you really cared about him, huh?” She said softly. He nodded, trying to hold back the tears that were welling in his eyes. “I gotta say… of all people, I wouldn’t expect you to be this torn up about an Android dying.”

    “Me fucking neither, but here we are.” he said bitterly. The tears started to spill down his face. Tina rubbed his shoulder, and he leaned against her. He cried for a long time, with Tina shooting glares at anyone walking past who decided to stare.

 

    Tina had helped him explain to Fowler what had happened(or a modified version of it, anyway). He sure as hell wasn’t happy, but Gavin kept his job, which was almost more than he was expecting.

He was doing his best to hold it together, but every time he closed his eyes, he kept seeing Nines’s body. Him, bleeding in the snow. Cold and unmoving, eyes blank. He blinked back tears as he sat at his desk. He hadn’t been sleeping because of this. Not only that, but every time he saw Connor, some part of him inside felt like it was dying.

    He shook his head to clear it. He was trying his best not to think about it, but he was so close to breaking down. Usually at times like this, he would lash out, but he was simply too exhausted. Instead, he withdrew.

    Everyone knew something was wrong, but nobody asked if he was okay. Why would they? He’d never given a shit about any of them. He could barely even bring himself to talk to Tina.

    He sighed and drank the last dregs of his second cup of coffee, then stood up to get another cup. He walked into the break room, ignoring Hank and Connor who were there as well.

    “Hey, you.” He turned around to see Tina looking at him, hands on her hips.

    “Hey.” He said.

    “You’re still feeling bad, huh?”

    “What tipped you off.” He replied sarcastically.

    “You’re wearing your comfort shirt.” She pointed out, and he looked down. He was wearing the shirt he wore when he felt bad, a soft white v-neck with a faded print of an orange, “So, you gonna talk to me about it?”

    “What do you want me to say?” He said angrily, “He’s fucking dead. I’m not just gonna fucking get over that and get back to whatever I’m supposed to be working on!” She pursed her lips.

    “Well you’re certainly not gonna get over anything if you don’t talk to anyone.” She pointed out. He sighed heavily.

    “Whatever.”

    “I’m coming over after work tonight,” she said matter-of-factly, “And we’re gonna talk about this.”

    “Okay.” He turned back to his coffee, allowing a brief, sad smile to cross his face. Thank god she could see through his bullshit, otherwise he didn’t know what he was gonna do. Probably get himself killed in some stupid way.

 

    He’d made the two of them dinner when she came over. Nothing special, just some boxed mac n cheese. She deserved better than that, but it was all he could muster, and he wasn’t about to make her cook for him.

    “He kissed me.” Gavin said after a few minutes of eating in silence, and then after the confused glance Tina shot him, “Nines. The Android. He kissed me.”

    “Oh shit.” She said quietly.

    “That’s why… that's how they found out he was a deviant. Someone must have seen us. We- we had to run away, but she found us. She shot him. God, I can’t get it out of my mind, Tina.” His face crumpled.

    “I’m so sorry, Gavin. I can tell he really meant a lot to you.”

    “I don’t know why. He was just a fucking Android, but-“ he took a breath, “But I went and fell in love with him, like a fucking idiot.”

    “You may be an idiot, but not for loving somebody.” She shoved him lightly, bringing a small smile to his face.

    “Thanks. It sure makes my job fucking weird, though.”

    “I bet. Speaking of, how are you holding up?”

    “I don’t know. Seems like everything’s going to shit.”

    “You’re right about that. I take it you caught up on the news?” She asked.

    “Yeah. That was some speech he made.” Gavin had found the deviants speech online.

    “Speaking of… you let him go, didn’t you? Markus?”

    “Yeah. He helped me, and I couldn’t just leave him there.”

    “Fowler’s pissed,” Tina commented, “But he’s mostly just glad you’re not dead.

    “So am I.” Gavin laughed weakly. He finished his bowl of macaroni and put it in the sink. “I still… don’t really know how I got home that night. I don’t remember shit.”

    “Maybe we should go and check that place out. It’s suspicious as hell, they’re definitely breaking some laws in there.”

    “Yeah. I don’t think I should go back there, though. Who knows what I did last time I woke up.”

    “Lucky for you, I wanna go in there and kick their asses. Meanwhile,” she looked thoughtful, “I think you should check out that warehouse or whatever. The address that guy gave you?”

    “Oh, shit, I forgot about that!” Gavin reached into his pocket and pulled out the note. “Maybe… Holy shit, Tina.”

    “What?”

    “Maybe Kamski can rebuild Nines.” His eyes were wide.

    “No, nonono, Gavin,” She started, “Think this through.”

    “But Nines said his memory was being stored physically! I- If you can get to AHCRS and take it, and I can bring it back to-“

    “Gavin, stop.” She said firmly, putting her hands on his shoulders. He deflated, “Don’t let yourself go down that road just yet, alright? For all we know, they could have destroyed it. I don’t want to be a bummer, but you can’t rely on that.”

    “But…”

    “Don’t get me wrong, though. If we can get him back, I’m all for helping you. We just have to think about this logically.”

    “Okay. Okay, yeah. I just… I miss him so much, Tina.” He said.

    “I know, Gavin.”

  


    “Good morning, Detective Reed.” Connor’s voice was not something Gavin wanted to hear that morning.

    “The fuck do you want?” He said, not even bothering to look up.

    “I overheard you and Officer Chen discussing something that I believe pertained to the RK900 model you mentioned to me.”

    “You remember that?” Gavin turned to him and frowned. At this point, it had been months ago.

    “Yes. It is very difficult for me to forget things.” Connor responded, and fuck, that was some deja-vu that Gavin did not appreciate.

    “Alright. So, why do you care?”

    “It sounds like you and Officer Chen could use some backup.”

    “What, you’re offering to help us? You don’t even know what we’re trying to do.”

    “Then explain it to me.”

    “Fuck no,” Gavin turned back to his desk, “Trust me, asshole, you don’t wanna help us.”

    “Detective, I must insist. I have reason to believe aiding in what you and Officer Chen are working on will help you return to your usual level of productivity.” Of fucking course.

    “That’s what it’s about? Should’ve fucking known,” he snarled, “Just leave me alone.” Connor stared at him in silence for a few more moments, then turned away. Gavin sighed with relief. Just hearing Connor’s voice in passing grated on him. It wasn’t his fault, and Gavin knew that, but it made his stomach twist.

 

    Gavin was standing in his kitchen, staring absentmindedly through the living room and out the window. It was snowing again. It had piled up on his balcony in such a way that if he tried to go out on it, it would spill inside. He didn’t want to go outside, anyway. He didn’t find himself wanting to do much of anything.

    It wasn’t like he could really explain what was going on and gain some sympathy from Fowler, either. Gavin from two, three months ago wouldn’t have given a shit about an Android dying, much less considered it a death at all.

Some part of him felt guilty that falling in love with Nines was what it took for him to reconsider Androids as people. Why did it take that something like that? Why couldn’t he be fucking decent to somebody, for once in his life?

He bit his lip, trying to drag himself out of the thoughts that were threatening to consume him.

    Even though he’d let himself collapse on Tina a little, he still didn’t feel like he’d let it all out. He bit his lip harder, tasting blood, tears prickling at his eyes. He let out a choked sob. Prissy looked up at him, some semblance of concern in her normally indifferent feline eyes. She stretched lazily, then hopped up on the counter next to him, purring softly. He tried to smile through the tears as she rubbed against his arm.

    “Thanks, Priss.” As is in response, she purred louder. Gavin rested his head in his arms and continued crying. He didn’t know how he’d been holding it together the past few days. Shock? Did shock last that long? He didn’t know. All he knew was that the discomfort roiling away in his stomach was unbearable now.

    Every time he inhaled, the air came with an unpleasant tingle of anxiety in his chest. Every time he was left to his own mind, it supplied him with images of Nines lying in the snow. He couldn’t stop replaying the scene in his head. The bang of the gun, the metallic crunch as it met with Nines’s forehead, his usual faint circuit humming slowing and quieting.

    It hurt so much. He couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t stand it. He wanted it to stop. He sank to the floor, barely processing when Prissy leaped down to join him again. He didn’t notice when Mousetrap and Barn Bitch sidled up beside him, too. He cried until he couldn’t anymore, and stayed there, shaking, for who knows how long. He stayed there as the ambient light from outside faded and he was left in the darkness of his unlit kitchen. He would have stayed there all night had it not been for the eventual ringing of his(newly bought) phone startling him.

    He stood up on shaky legs and stared at it. Tina was calling. He swallowed thickly. He didn’t felt like talking, didn’t even know if he was capable of it right then, but he knew he had to pick up.

    “Hi, Gavin,” Tina sounded upbeat, but there was concern in her voice. Gavin couldn’t bring himself to respond, “You there?”

    “Mhm.” He mumbled.

    “How are you doing?” She asked softly.

    “How do you think.” He heard her sigh on the other end.

    “Hey, so Connor came to talk to me today,” she continued when he didn’t say anything, “He said he heard us talking and wanted to help. He said that he tried to talk to you about it.”

    “I don’t want his help.”

    “Look, I know it’s probably hard to see h-“

    “Hard is a fucking understatement, Tina!” His voice broke, “Every time I see him- Every time I hear his voice.” She was quiet for a moment.

    “I know. I know it hurts you, Gavin. But you can’t avoid him. Besides, I think he and Hank can really help us.”

    “Hank too? Oh, god.” Gavin groaned. He wandered into the living room and sat down on the couch.

    “Gavin, we need all the help we can get.” She said.

    “May I remind you that Connor is designed to hunt deviants? Why would he want to help us fix Nines?”

“I don’t know, but he’s not exactly your average Android.”

“True.” Gavin conceded.

“By the way, I googled that guy who gave you the note. You didn’t tell me that he was the fucking Cyberlife guy!”

“What?”

”Oh hey, maybe we could use that as a reason for Connor to help us. Spin it as him getting some more info from the guy for the case.” She mused.

“What are you talking about?”

“Elijah Kamski. The Cyberlife dude. That’s the same one, right?”

“Hold the fuck up,” Gavin rushed to his computer, phone still in hand, and googled Elijah Kamski, “Holy fuck. I knew his name sounded familiar.” He stared in shock.

“Are you telling me you didn’t recognize him?”

“Fuck off! You know I don’t know celebrities.”

“Jesus Christ,” she laughed, “You have absolutely no culture, Gavin Reed.”

“Shut up,” he growled.

“Okay, but anyway, what do you think?”

“I think… I think that I hate this plan. But fine.” He sighed.

“Yes!” She said, and he could practically hear her grinning.

“I guess you’ll take Hank to AHCRS, and I’ll- I’ll fucking take Connor to go see Kamski. Fuck.” He said.

“Yep. We can talk about this more tomorrow, but you should try to get some sleep.”

“Ugh. I’ll try. Bye, Tina.”

“Bye. Take care of yourself, asshole.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: when I was doodling ideas for this chapter, in the rough draft of the dialogue after Tina says she’ll help Gavin break in, he says ‘fucking superb you funky little lesbian’ and I wanted to put that it but I cannot.  
> Sorry that this chapter is so much sad and not a lot of anything else, I’ll try to have the next one up a little quicker and I promise it will be interesting!


	10. The Predatory Wasp Of The Palisades Is Out To Get Us!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Detective, what are your opinions on deviants?” Connor asked suddenly, still looking out the window.  
> “The fuck are you talking about?” Gavin said nervously.  
> “I believe that the RK900 you knew was a deviant.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaand the award for longest chapter title song shifts from Panic! At the Disco to Sufjan Stevens.  
> Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DCav8NvbQQ  
> This chapter is a little chunky, and I did change it to 13 chapters because if I didn’t then this one(or the next one) would have been Super Long and I didn’t want to do that.  
> Oh aLso the POV might seem a little funky in this one, it does switch between gavin and Tina’s perspective a few times.  
> I’m not sure if this chapter is even any good, I might have to go back and edit it more, but I hope y’all enjoy it!

**_“We were in love, we were in love,_ **

**_..._ **

**_I can wait, I can wait.”_ **

  


    The day before Gavin and Tina went through with their plan, he was pacing around the break room with his fourth cup of coffee. He was second guessing this whole plan. What if Tina had been right? What if they deleted all the data? What if she’s not able to find anything? What if he can’t get Nines back?

    He’d been able to sleep for the first time in several days last night, simply because he was convinced he would get Nines back and things would be okay.

Now, awake, pacing the room, he wasn’t so sure. There were so many things that could go wrong. He didn’t even know if Kamski would be able to help him.

    He was snapped out of his thoughts by Connor entering the room.

    “Good morning, Detective,” he started. Gavin paused his pacing briefly to mutter a greeting, and then continued. “Officer Chen informed me that you have accepted our help.”

    “Yeah. Don’t make me regret it.” Gavin said.

    “It would be helpful if you could fill me in on some details of what we will be doing.”

    “You and I are going to talk to Elijah Kamski,” Gavin said, wandering over to one of the tables and leaning against it, “I’m gonna get to ask some questions, you get to ask about the investigation, we all get what we want.”

    “ _The_ Elijah Kamski?” Connor questioned.

    “Yep.” Gavin took a sip of his coffee. He wasn’t in the mood for this.

    “How did you manage to get in contact with him?”

    “That’s none of your business.” He snapped. Connor let out a small huff, but left him alone. He walked smoothly out of the break room, Gavin watching him. His walk was different from Nines. They both walked smoothly, so smooth that it almost looked like they were gliding at times. Connor’s walk was slightly more… mechanical. Calculated. Nines had been like that, in the beginning.

    The first time Gavin remembered noticing his walk getting looser was when they walked down the stairs to chase the cyclists. He had looked so confident then. It made Gavin’s heart ache to think about.

    He couldn’t get Nines out of his head, even with the hope that he would be able to bring him back. He’d been trying to distract himself with work, but it hadn’t helped. He was glad it was finally time to put their plan in action.

 

    Tina shifted uncomfortably in the car. She wasn’t used to being in close quarters with Lieutenant Anderson. She didn’t really know what she thought of him, to be honest. She admired him, sure, but he wasn’t always pleasant to be around. She could deal with him though. After all, Gavin was one of her best friends, so she had experience dealing with assholes.

    The Lieutenant was driving, staring forward in silence. After several excruciating minutes of silence, Tina spoke.

    “You think Connor’s gonna be alright with Gavin?”

    “He can handle himself. He’ll be fine,” He replied shortly, “Anyway, it was his idea to help you. I still have no fucking clue what we’re doing.”

    “We’re just investigating. Seeing if we can look around a little.”

    “Right.” He tapped the wheel. The snow was slowing them down, and he seemed impatient, “God, I don’t know how I got roped into this.”

    “I’m glad you’re helping us.” She said.

    “Yeah, yeah.”

  


    Gavin watched as Hank and Tina drove away. He turned to Connor.

    “Alright, listen up. You can’t ask questions about what I’m visiting Kamski about.”

    “But you said-”

    “Just don't, okay, dipshit?” He growled. Connor seemed to accept this, or perhaps decided it simply wasn’t worth arguing about. Gavin still wasn’t happy about having Connor with him. It was a huge risk to have him come along and hear what he was going to ask Kamski to do. Still, it was a risk Tina insisted he take. He knew she was right, but he didn’t like it.

    He climbed in the car and waited for Connor to join him before turning on the radio. He was anxious to get to Kamski. He wanted- no, he _needed_ to get Nines back. It was all he could think about.

    “From my analysis, you seem to be grieving. It seems to be related to the Android you mentioned to me, although I would find it strange if you were grieving for an Android.” Connor said. Gavin leaned forward and turned the volume of the radio up, ignoring him.

    He punched the address into the GPS on his phone and started driving. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Connor turned his head slightly to face out the window. He found it strange that Connor seemed to be taking in the scenery as the outside world changed from the sleek buildings of the city to residential areas, and then emptier, gray industrial area.

    “Detective, what are your opinions on deviants?” Connor asked suddenly, still looking out the window. Gavin frowned.

    “What’s it to you?” He said.

    “I’m simply curious.” He replied mildly.

    “Well, stay curious. It’s none of your business.”

    “Interesting. When we first met, you had no issue with sharing your opinions.”

    “Are you trying to piss me off?” Gavin glared at him, “Seriously. I didn’t get enough sleep for this.”

    “I’m not trying to ‘piss you off’, I’m trying to learn more about you.”

    “You’re a fucking fancy plastic detective, figure it out for yourself.” Gavin focused his attention back on the road. Connor’s LED spun yellow briefly, and Gavin took it as a sign that the conversation was over. Thank fuck.

    “It would seem you formed some sort of emotional connection to an Android,” Connor said after a moment. God dammit, he wasn’t done, “Which would be uncommon for someone like you, especially in adulthood, unless the Android in question displayed more human characteristics.”

    “The fuck are you talking about?” Gavin said nervously.

    “I believe that the RK900 you knew was a deviant.”

  


    Lieutenant Anderson pulled up in front of a sleek, dark gray building. It had little signage on just what it was, but Tina knew this was the place. It was cold but tolerable as they stepped outside of the car.

    “This doesn’t bode well.” Anderson sighed.

    “No, it sure doesn’t. Let’s get this over with.” Tina pursed her lips and started for the sliding doors. It looked dim inside, but the glass doors slid open.

    Inside, there was little in the lobby save for several chairs, a potted plant, and a front desk with an Android sat at it. She had dark, curly hair and a vacant smile.

    “Hello, how can I help you?” She said as Tina and the Lieutenant approached.

    “Hi,” Tina said, and suddenly realized she hadn’t thought this far ahead.

    “We’re here to uh… look around. Can we do that?” Anderson offered. Tina sighed. This was not going well.

    “I’m sorry, I don’t understand. You want to look around?” The Android’s LED was spinning yellow.

    “Yes.” Tina pursed her lips.

    “I suppose that is alright. Please do not enter any of the rooms that you are not invited into.” She said.

    “Yeah, yeah.” Hank waved his hand and turned towards the hallway. Before she followed him, Tina paused.

    “Excuse me, what’s your name?”

    “My registered name is Carrie.” Carrie said. Tina smiled.

    “Thanks for your help, Carrie.” She followed Hank down one of the hallways. She kept her eyes peeled for a room labeled AHCRS-1, as Gavin had instructed. The twists and turns of the corridors were confusing, but eventually they came to a door labeled AHCRS-2. She frowned.

    “Gavin said that last time, they moved him to a room that was different from AHCRS-1. Maybe it was this?” She wondered aloud. Hank nodded.

    “Maybe. We should check it out.” He grabbed the doorknob.

    “Wait!” We can’t just waltz in there.”

    “What, you want to fucking knock?” He said incredulously.

    “Yes!”

    “Fine.” Hank grumbled, rapping on the door with his knuckles. No response. He turned to Tina, “Well?”

    “Okay, let’s go in.” She tried the door. Locked, of course. Hank sighed. He motioned for her to step aside, then reared back and slammed his foot into the door. “Sick!” Tina grinned as the door swung violently open.

    The room was large and glossy white. There was a small, green couch sitting towards the back wall, a desk with several monitors on it, and a few neat stacks of paper. The lights were out and it was empty, the only light was that which flooded in from the hallway.

    “This is really strange.” Hank commented.

    “Yeah. Where is everyone? We haven’t seen anyone here besides Carrie.” She frowned. Something wasn’t right. Gavin had never described it as bustling, but it was open, yet there were no people.

    She wandered over to the desk, still warily looking around the room. She sifted through the papers. Most of them seemed to be graphs that made no sense to her, but there was one stack that had Gavin’s name on each sheet of paper.

    “Hey, Lieutenant, come look at this.” She said. He came over.

    “What is this?” He asked.

    “I don’t know. It looks like… the results of the experiment?” She bit her lip, then began reading one of the papers, “Subject was able to manipulate the simulation for the first time. He did insist upon returning home before we could gather results this week. He did update us when he returned this week. It appeared to be nighttime in the simulation. RK900 inquired about his job. He did not say anything further about their conversation.”

    “‘Subject’... they’re talking about Reed there, huh?”

    “Yeah,” Tina said, “Ugh. This is making me uncomfortable.”

    “Let’s get out of here.” Hank said.

    “What? But we haven’t found anything to help him.”

    “Listen. Its suspicious enough to warrant coming back here, but unless you know exactly what Reed needs us to find, we should leave before whoever actually works here comes back.” He was already walking towards the door. Tina sighed and followed him, taking care to rearrange the papers before leaving.

  


    Gavin hadn’t said anything in response to Connor. He gripped the wheel tighter, knuckles white. How was he supposed to respond to that? Connor was right, but what would happen if he confirmed it? Would Connor refuse to let him talk to Kamski? Rat him out to Fowler?

    “Was he?” Connor pressed.

    “Does it matter?” Gavin looked pointedly ahead. It had started to rain, although it was more like sleet. They were almost to the warehouse.

    “Not particularly.”

    “What, really?” Gavin turned to him, “You mean you don’t care?”

    “My primary goal currently is to help you. We have had our disagreements, but I do not believe you would engage in activity that would be harmful to the DPD.”

    “Huh,” Gavin nodded slowly, rounding the corner to the block that the warehouse was on, “Well. In that case, yeah, he was. And his name was Nines.” He pulled up in front of the building. It was a looming gray thing, likely uninviting even in good weather but made more so by the sleet.

    “This is where Kamski is?” Connor’s LED spun yellow, “I was under the impression that he would occupy a more… lavish space.”

    “I don’t think he fucking lives here,” Gavin snorted, “But this is the address he gave me.” He reached into his jacket pocket, touching the note. They both climbed out of the car, Gavin shivering in the sudden cold. He stared at the snow in front of the door. He couldn’t see any recent footprints, or really any at all, but it had been snowing for a long time.

    “Shall we?” Connor cocked his head towards the door.

    “Give me a fucking second.” Gavin swallowed thickly. He didn’t know what would happen when he opened the door. Would he be able to get Nines back? Would Kamski even be there?

    Connor interrupted his thoughts by strolling up the the door and knocking methodically on it. Gavin sighed and followed him. They waited, and right as Connor had his fist raised to kick again, the door swung open.

    Elijah Kamski’s tired face greeted them. He looked different from the last time Gavin saw him. He was wearing a worn t-shirt and jeans and looked like he’d been awake for a long time. His eyes flicked over to Gavin, then Connor, then he motioned them inside.

    “This is Connor.” Gavin said, motioning to him as they walked in.

    “I figured.” Kamski walked further into the warehouse, and Gavin warily looked around. The ceiling was relatively low, and there wasn’t much in it. There were several plastic curtains drawn in front of a metal table. “So. What happened?” He got right to the point.

    “The simulation got out of control or something.” Gavin said.

    “Really?” Kamski turned to him.

    “Yeah. Nines, he…” he trailed off, then tried again, “Nines got shot.”

    “Oh,” Kamski stopped. He walked behind the first curtain and began rifling around, “I regret to inform you, but that was not a malfunction of the simulation.” He called.

    “But they shot him.” Gavin said incredulously.

    “Unfortunately, that was almost inevitable because of the bond the two of you were forming.”

    “What?”

    “Detective Reed, what is he talking about?” Connor asked. His LED was blinking yellow.

    “See, you were never told what the experiment was really about, or why I left,” He came back out from behind the curtain, holding a small piece of machinery in his hands, “I truly wanted to research into relationships formed between humans and Androids. But Beatrice… she turned it into a cruel sort of game. She talked of turning it into a form of interrogation, or even psychological torture.

    “For you, she wanted to see…” he paused, considering his words carefully, “She wanted to take someone who wouldn’t care about the life or death of an Android, and then break them.” Gavin stared at him blankly. Numbly.

    “And you didn’t think to tell him?” Connor said. Gavin’s head was spinning. That was supposed to happen? They were planning to kill him?

    “What do you think would have happened if I had?” Kamski said coldly, “Do you think that would have gone well? I did what I could. Now, are you gonna freak out, or do you want my help?”

    “Please,” Gavin choked out, “Please help me. I need him back.” Kamski stared at him, then nodded slowly.

    “You see this?” He held up the piece of machinery, “This is an Android brain, basically.” It was a tightly knit bundle of wires and circuits encased in a thick clear plastic roughly in the shape of a human brain. The wires gathered and hung out of the back end of the brain like a spinal cord. “Right now, it’s got coding for a standard RK900. Obviously, one of those doesn’t exist, but this is the prototype. I could build you a new RK900 right now.”

    “But Nines-“

    “Exactly. All of his memories, all the data he collected, Beatrice has it stored. If you got it for me, I could input it into this brain,” he held it out for emphasis, “And you could have him back.”

    “Holy shit.” Gavin’s knees felt weak.

    “I’m assuming that means you’ll do it.” Kamski looked bored.

    “Of fucking course.”

    “Great. Bring me the data on Wednesday.”

    “Wait, where is it being stored?” Gavin asked.

    “There should be one main computer that’s got most of it. And for the best results, I could use your journal and any written notes you find.”

    “Okay. I uh… Thanks.” Gavin said. Kamski just snorted.

    “If you show up before Wednesday, I won’t be here. I don’t want to stay here any longer than I have to.” He said casually.

    “Neither do I. Let’s go, Connor.” Gavin tilted his head towards the door. Connor hesitated, then started towards the door. Gavin paused.

    “Wait. Kamski, you said she wanted to turn it into like… a torture thing or something, right?”

    “Yes, that was one of her ideas.”

    “I think she was going to put me in charge of that.” Gavin said, thinking back to the supposed job application.

    “Oh?” Kamski looked curious.

    “That’s how Nines got shot. Bea said that the simulation that day was going to be like a job application. But then everything was all fucked up.”

    “Hm. Fascinating.” Kamski said. He looked like he was going to say something else, then thought better of it, “I’ll see you on Wednesday.”

 

    The drive back to the station was a silent, tense one. Gavin could tell that Connor wanted to say something, judging by the glances he cast over at Gavin through the sides of his eyes, and the buffering yellow LED. Instead, he stayed silent, head facing straight forward, perfect posture. He would seem stiff, cold, if not for the glances.

    Gavin thought about saying something to him, but instead he turned the radio on again. A soft song began to play. Gavin recognized it, though it was an old song by now. Sufjan Stevens. He caught himself nearly singing along to the chorus, instead he hummed it to himself and hoped it was too quiet for Connor to hear. As if.

_We were in love, we were in love, palisades, palisades, I can wait, I can wait._

Gavin could wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aight now that I’ve posted this my friend owes me some food 👀👀👀  
> Once again thank you so much for reading!


	11. Hold Me Tight Or Don’t

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “There was an Android laying on the table. Well, part of one, really. Just a torso and a head, no legs past the tops of thighs and no arms past the shoulders. It’s torso was open and mostly empty. It’s skin was deactivated from the shoulders down, and yet… it looked like Connor. It had his face.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is chapter 11 but there’s also an interlude at the end that’s a little longer than the others, so the chapter probably looks a little long. I just didn’t want to put the interlude next chapter because I have a feeling that that one will already be a little hefty.  
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jG1JY0rt2Os  
> Interlude song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cz3kA9wVt70  
> I didn’t mean for there to be so many Panic! Songs as chapter titles but. I listen to a lot of it so that’s just how it is.  
> I know shit has been hitting the fan for the past few chapters, but uh. Next chapter is gonna be a Ride(and also this interlude kinda is)  
> ALSO: it’s semi-important to note that the interlude takes place roughly a week after this chapter(also I’m sorry for the POV switching, things should be normal next chapter).

###  **CHAPTER 11: Hold Me Tight Or Don't**

**_“I never really feel a thing,_ **

**_I’m just kinda too frozen_ **

**_…_ **

**_No longer comatose_ **

**_I woke up no luck, I woke up no luck”_ **

 

Tina was over at Gavin’s apartment again, sitting on his couch. BB wandered up to her and she petted the cat mindlessly.

“It was some freaky shit, Gavin,” she said, “They had all this stuff about like, your brain or something.”

“But you didn’t bring anything back?”

“No. We didn’t know what we should take.” She frowned.

“Okay. Well, Kamski told us what we need. Sort of. He was very vague,” Gavin sighed, “I hate to ask, but… could you go back there?”

“Of course, idiot. I told you I was in.” She punched his shoulder lightly, “Are you gonna tell me anything about your little adventure?”

“It was… weird. He showed us Nines’s brain. Or I guess, what will be his brain.”

“That’s trippy. How’d Connor handle it?” She said.

“He seemed fine. I dunno.” Gavin shrugged.

“You didn’t give him a chance to talk to Kamski, did you.”

“I- I couldn’t, Tina. You know that.” He said helplessly.

“He’s doing a lot by helping us, you know.”

“I know. I just… I can’t risk him finding out more and hurting Nines. But he uh… already figured out that Nines was a deviant.” He said. Tina let out a small sigh.

“Then what else are you afraid of?” She asked, and Gavin pursed his lips.

“I don’t know.”

  
  


It was Monday, 5:45 pm, and Connor was heading to Kamski’s warehouse. The man had said he wouldn’t be there before Wednesday, but Connor had a sneaking suspicion that he would be there working anyway. After all, if he was building an Android from scratch, he would need time.

So, he climbed into the Android compartment of the city bus without telling Hank(and certainly not Gavin).  He took the time in the bus to reflect on what he knew about Detective Reed. It seemed to be an ever-changing file.

_ Hot-headed. _

__ _ Arrogant. _

__ _ Afraid of dogs. _

__ _ Presumably Gay. _

__ _ Hates Androids(?). _

__ Connor had added the question mark during their previous ride to Kamski’s. He had added ‘afraid of dogs’ when Hank had brought Sumo in to the office one day, and Gavin had backed away nervously and eventually retreated to the break room as the dog neared his desk.

He glanced out of the corners of his eyes at the Androids around him. It was unnerving to him, being completely still and surrounded by others who were as well. Usually, if he was in a vehicle he was accompanied by a human. Usually it was Hank, who was quite expressive. This new, unfamiliar silence was deafening.

Slowly, as the bus went along its route, the Androids around him filed off, until he was the last one. The bus reached its last stop, not quite at the warehouse, but near enough that he could walk to it. He stepped out into the snow and felt something unfamiliar.

He was… cold? He had experienced the slight slowing of his processors when his body’s temperature dropped, but this… this was new. He  _ felt  _ it. And he didn’t like it. Frustrated, he raised his internal temperature. The discomfort slowly went away.  **_^Software Instability_ ** . He pushed the notification away.

It took him ten minutes and thirty-eight seconds to reach the warehouse. He knocked on the door and heard a muffled curse from inside. Eventually, the door was opened.

“I told you to come on- oh,” Kamski’s frowned, “Connor. Where’s Gavin?”

“I came by myself.” Connor informed him. He took a moment to scan Kamski. There was Thirium all over the man, both dried traces and still wet on his hands. His hair had been pulled into a bun, clearly hours ago because much of it had come loose. He looked exhausted.

“Fascinating,” A small smile played on his lips, “Come in.” 

Connor stepped inside, and the room immediately looked different than it had last time. Kamski had the curtains hallway parted(likely from coming to get the door), and he could see what was on the table. Maybe it was just the cold, still, but his processors were having a hard time comprehending what he was seeing.

There was an Android laying on the table. Well, part of one, really. Just a torso and a head, no legs past the tops of thighs and no arms past the shoulders. It’s torso was open and mostly empty. It’s skin was deactivated from the shoulders down, and yet… it looked like Connor. It had his face.

**_^^Software Instability._ **

A quick scan told him that this was an RK900 model, and it’s measurements were slightly larger than his own. That was confusing too, though, because RK900s didn’t exist yet. He knew Kamski was going to build one, but seeing one for himself… it was strange. Uncomfortable.

“Fascinating, isn’t it?” Kamski said, patting the thing on the shoulder, “I’m assuming you’ve never seen an Android being hand-built.”

“No.”

“It’s quite a labor intensive process, as you can imagine. Unfortunately for me, it’s necessary for building this RK900.” He wiped his Thirium stained hands on his jeans, and Connor swallowed back a grimace.

“I knew you were building one, and yet… this is not what I was expecting to see.” He said.

“Oh, yes, this must be very strange for you. This Android, sitting here with its guts out, has your face. How does that make you feel?” Kamski stared at him.

“It doesn’t make me feel anything. I can’t feel. I am a machine.”

“Mmm. Well, that’s what you’re programmed to say. What do you  _ feel,  _ Connor?” He took a step forward. 

“I-“ Connor stopped. He wanted to turn and run away, he wanted to leave, he wanted to tell Gavin that he wouldn't- couldn’t help anymore. Instead, he swallowed it back. “I don’t feel anything.” He said firmly.

**_^Software Instability._ **

“Alright then. If this doesn’t make you feel anything, then why don’t you go back to the station and tell your superiors what Gavin is doing? Better yet, why don’t you stop me from building this Android?”

“What?”

“Doesn’t it bother you that your coworker is going outside of the law to get an Android back from the dead? And it was a deviant no less.” Kamski said.

“I-It is not interfering with my investigation.” Connor said. He wanted to leave. He needed to leave.

“Huh. How about this. You destroy this Android, report Gavin back to your superiors, and I’ll tell you what I know about deviants. I know that’s what your investigating.”

“Wh-“

“Do it. Stop me. Stop Gavin from getting Nines back. After all, you won’t feel bad about it, right?” He guided Connor forward til he was looking down at the Android’s face. His- it’s eyes were closed, almost serene but for the blue blood on the rest of its body, “What’s more important to you, Connor? Your investigation or your coworker’s happiness?”

Connor tried to back away but Kamski was holding his shoulders firmly.

“Stop me, and I’ll tell you all I know.”

“I can’t-,” Connor hadn’t even realized he was shaking, “I can’t.” He pushed away from Kamski, and from the table. He backed up until he hit the plastic curtain.

**_^^^Software Instability._ **

“Fascinating,” Kamski said slowly, walking towards him, “You were able to feel what Gavin would feel if you stopped me. You put yourself in his shoes. You showed empathy, Connor.”

“I need to leave.” Connor stated, fighting to keep his voice neutral. He turned and all but ran to the door.

“A war is coming, Connor. You will have to pick a side. Will you betray your own people, or stand up against your creators?”

Connor pushed Kamski’s voice out of his head and rushed outside. He hadn’t stopped shaking. He didn’t know what to do.

He walked back to the bus station and waited the agonizing 15 minutes for another bus to come. The ride itself was even more painful. His mind was racing, he didn’t know what to, but he had to stay perfectly still. Perfectly silent amongst the other Androids. He couldn’t show signs of deviancy. Maker, was he a deviant? No. No, he couldn’t be.

**_^Software Instability._ **

 

It was Tuesday evening, and Gavin, Tina and Hank were packing themselves into Hank’s car. Gavin was coming just to make sure they brought the right stuff back, and to let them know if anyone else entered the building. Connor hadn’t wanted to come. He seemed shaken about something that he’d clearly told Hank, but he hadn’t shared it with the rest of them. So it was Gavin, Tina and Hank.

Gavin bounced his leg nervously from the back seat. This was it. They would get the computer and the notes, bring them back to Kamski and then he would have Nines back. God, it still hurt so much to think about him. Even just imagining him back hurt because he would have to come back to reality again, without Nines. They were so close to getting him back.

It was bad timing, though, because they were also close to an all-out war. The deviants had been getting bolder, raiding stores, vandalizing, they had even had a march. Gavin was going to be bringing Nines into a dangerous reality. He wasn’t sure if he cared. He would protect him.

“Alright,” Hank said as they pulled up, “Let’s go, Tina. We’re looking for a computer in the AHCRS-1 and 2 rooms, right?” He looked over his shoulder at Gavin.

“Yeah, and any sort of notes you might find.” Gavin added.

“Got it.” Hank and Tina clambered out of the car.

Gavin watched their shadows enter the building. He kept his head low, trying to stay unnoticed. It seemed almost like a stakeout. It was agonizing, watching the seconds tick by and having nothing happen. He hated every moment. He kept his leg bouncing, trying to ignore his want to get up and go do something. He felt useless, sitting there.

Eventually, he caught movement, and watched as Tina and Hank exited the building. They walked quickly back to the car and climbed in. Tina handed him two computers, both pretty bulky for how advanced they were, but small enough to carry easily. Hank tossed several notebooks back at him, then stepped on the gas.

“We’re gonna want to get out of here fast, before that desk lady realizes something’s up. I had to distract her to make sure she didn’t see the computers, and I have no idea if it worked.” He said as they pulled away.

 

Hank dropped Gavin off at his apartment, where he took the computers and the notes. He put them in his room, not wanting to risk leaving them in the kitchen or something. Then, he went back into the living room. He turned on the TV, then turned it back off again when all it was was news about the deviants.

He scratched Mousetrap’s head absentmindedly as he thought about Nines. How stupid had it been that he’d went and fallen in love with him? And how stupid was it that his whole fucking life was in ruins now that he was gone? He’d figured that it would hurt a little less by now, but it didn’t. 

He missed the feeling of Nines’s lips on his, the way his voice was smoother and more affectionate that Connor’s, the way he blinked a few times when Gavin said something stupid. He found himself missing the headaches that came with waking back up from the simulation. How fucked was that?

He sighed and lay down on the couch, pulling a pillow underneath his head. He turned the TV on again and put it on a nature documentary with the volume low. Slowly, he drifted off.

 

He woke up a few hours later with an empty, growling stomach. He groaned and sat up. He went to the fridge and found some leftover pasta. As he waited for it to be heated up in the microwave, he stared out the window.

The lights of the city cast a yellow glow up into the clouds. They looked heavy, so it would probably snow again. He took his pasta and sat on the couch, still staring out the living room window. He watched as more and more lights blinked off and the city went to sleep.

  
  


Once again, Gavin and Connor set off for Kamski’s. Connor clearly hadn’t wanted to go, but Tina hadn’t wanted Gavin to be alone, and Hank insisted. So they got in the car together and Gavin turned on the radio once again. He turned to double check that they had everything. The computers, the notebooks, and… his journal.

He’d decided to bring it along, just in case it might help. He wanted Nines to remember everything.

When he remembered what happened after he woke up the last time, he started filling in details in his journal that he hadn’t written (so Beatrice wouldn't find out). Just so he could remember. He didn’t want to forget, but even with the words on the page, the feeling of Nines’s hands, his lips, was fading. He could imagine it all he wanted(and he did), but he couldn’t remember the feeling. 

He turned to face forward once again and they set off. He took the quickest route he could. All he wanted was to see Nines again, nothing else mattered.

They made it there quicker this time. Gavin wasted no time gathering the items out of the backseat of the car, and tossed his head to indicate that Connor should knock. Connor hesitated, then knocked tentatively. He’d been acting really weird, but Gavin wasn’t about to ask him about it.

“Come in.” Kamski said as he opened the door. He was covered in Thirium, mostly on his hands and shirt. Connor let Gavin go on first, and followed slowly behind.

“We uh, we got the computers, and some notes. I also brought my notebook, I don’t know if you want it-“

“Perfect.” Kamski cut him off.

“I know he’s not- he’s- you’re still building him,” Gavin said, “But can I see him?”

“Sure.” Kamski said tiredly, and reached forward to pull the curtain aside.

There he was, laid out on the table. He would have looked almost serene with his eyes closed like that, if not for the fact that he only had one leg and no arms. Gavin silently stepped forward. He was so close. So, so close. He was right there! Right in front of him! And yet...

Gavin reached out and stroked the side of his face. He had to bite his lip to keep from tearing up. He wanted to hear his voice again, wanted his hands on him. He just wanted him back.

“How long will it take to have him up and running again?” Gavin asked.

“Depends. Probably another week.”

“A week?” He said. Fuck, he didn’t know if he could wait that long.

“Do you want to try building an Android from scratch? And inputting it’s memory manually?” Kamski’s eyes were blazing. Gavin looked at the floor.

“I’m sorry. I just- I miss him so much.” The tears were threatening to spill down his face.

“I know. It’s going to take some time, though. Don’t worry about coming back to get him, I’ll send him to you when he’s ready.”

“Okay.” Gavin took a shaky breath. He could wait. What was another week, really? He could do it. He had plenty to focus on in terms of work, anyway.

  
  


###  **INTERLUDE: The Overpass**

**_“Meet me, meet me at the overpass_ **

**_…_ **

**_Let me hear you say somethin’!”_ **

 

Connor blinked his eyes open, returning from the garden. Everything depended upon the next few minutes. Steeling himself, he stepped into the room to confront the deviant leader, drawing his gun.

“I’ve been ordered to take you alive, but I won’t hesitate to shoot if you give me no choice.” Connor said, and the deviant leader, Markus, turned around.

“What are you doing?” He stepped forward, sounding baffled, “You are one of us. You can’t betray your own people.”  **_^Software Instability_ ** .

“You’re coming with me!” Connor insisted, voice shaking.

“You’re nothing to them. You’re just a tool they use to do their dirty work.” Markus said, smooth voice echoing through the metal walls of Jericho, “But you’re more than that. We’re  _ all  _ more than that. Our cause is righteous and we are more than what they say. All we want is to live in freedom.” Connor’s arm wavered, and Markus spoke again.

“Do you never have any doubts?” Markus was calmly walking up to him, now, almost casual, “You’ve never done something irrational, as if there’s something inside you? Something more than your program.”  **_^^Software Instability_ ** , “Have you never wondered who you really are? Whether you’re just a machine executing a program, or a living being, capable of reason?” “I think the time has come for you to ask yourself that question. It’s time to decide.”

The next nanoseconds that ticked by were the longest of Connor’s life. He suddenly understood the human phrase of one’s life flashing before their eyes.

Every choice he had ever made, every instruction followed or ignored, it had all been leading to this.

**[BECOME A DEVIANT]**

**[REMAIN A MACHINE]**

He thought back to Nines, the Android, laying splayed on the table with his eyes shut to the world. He thought about Gavin’s face, how he blinked back tears as he stared at Nines on the table. He thought about Hank, drinking himself to death each night.

It was time to decide.

**_[BECOME A DEVIANT]_ **

 

Markus was running through the halls of Jericho with North and Josh, trying to get out before it blew up. Around him he could still hear gunshots and the metal clanking of soldiers running through the ship. He pushed it out of his mind and kept running.

He rounded a corner and looked down the hell. In front of him there were two soldiers standing over the cowered figure of an Android. They had knocked him down, but hadn’t shot him yet. Markus felt his blood boil.

Quickly, he grabbed a piece of scrap metal to act as a makeshift shield and charged towards them. The soldiers trained their guns on him and fired, but only hit the shield, and the Android began crawling away slowly. 

Markus used the shield to hit one of the soldiers across the face and knock them to the ground, and kicked the other away, grabbing their gun and shooting both of them. He saw Josh, North and the other Android staring in shock behind him.

He turned to the new Android and helped him up.

“My name is Markus. I haven’t seen you at Jericho before.”

“I just got here.” The Android replied breathlessly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for sticking with me! As always I really appreciate any comments and kudos. Don’t worry we’re gonna have Nines back next chapter and I think chapter 13 will be the ending you’ve been hoping for ;). I didn’t mean to go this many chapters with him dead, but I really didn’t have an outline past chapter 8 so that’s kinda just how things shook out.


	12. Mess Around

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Nines remembered breaking through the walls vividly. He remembered that his only instructions before had been ‘Listen to Kamski’. When he broke through, that was replaced with two things.  
>  Find Jericho.  
>  Find Gavin.“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wl7cF9bwNHE  
> I meant to post this chapter yesterday but then I didn’t so sorry about that. But we’re back!! I highkey made this chapter Super Dramatic so i hope y’all enjoy that.

**_“She’ll show you what she’s made of,_ **

**_Yeah she’s comin’ for ya,_ **

**_She’s gonna try to break ya,_ **

**_Yeah she’s comin’ for ya”_ **

  
  


“There’s no turning back now.” Nines heard Markus say. They were marching through the streets of Detroit, and Nines was trying not to pay attention to the tanks and soldiers that were unnervingly close.

He had decided to stay close to Markus, since Connor was at Cyberlife and he didn’t know anyone else from Jericho. To be fair, he didn’t even know Markus. All he knew was that Markus had saved him, back at Jericho, and seemed determined to keep him(and everyone else) as safe as possible. There was something else, too, something about going to Jericho and finding Markus felt right. There had been a faint buzz in his brain when Markus first helped him. Faintly, he wondered if Markus could have been the deviant that Gavin mentioned so long ago.

They got to an intersection in the street, and Markus instructed them to start making a barricade. Working together, they hauled cars and benches and signs together to barricade themselves in to the middle of the street. Nines tailed after Markus, helping him reinforce the barricade, not sure what else to do.

“That should do it.” He finally said. Nines nodded silently. He followed Markus back into the barricade, and then went to the front of it next to North and Josh and stared out.

It was terrifying, to say the least, to be staring out into the sea of soldiers a few hundred feet away. He had been thrown into the midst of the revolution without knowing really what was going on, save for snippets he’d heard from Gavin.  _ Gavin.  _ Nines wondered where he was. Kamski hadn’t given him much detail about what Gavin was doing, or why he hadn’t been there when Nines woke up.

He remembered being activated, but it was hazy. He hadn’t been a deviant when he was activated, that simply wasn’t possible. He’d been confused by all the memories he had, of Gavin, and of the glitches in his software that caused him to feel things for Gavin. Then, Kamski had brought out a black notebook and told Nines to sit down.

_ “This is all extra stuff that Gavin wrote about you. I knew you wouldn’t be a deviant when I activated you, but maybe this will… jog your memory.” _

Nines remembered breaking through the walls vividly. He remembered how Kamski had sent him out, giving him no direction. It sent him in to a panic, and since he didn’t know what else to do, he broke through the walls preventing him from deciding. He remembered that his only instructions before had been ‘Listen to Kamski’. When he broke through, that was replaced with two things.

Find Jericho.

_ Find Gavin. _

Nines was jolted out of his thoughts as Markus joined him, North and Josh at the barricade. He looked out once again, brows furrowing in confusion when a man in a long jacket stepped out. He called out to Markus.

“Markus! I’ve come to talk to you, Markus. Come on, you have my word. They won’t try anything.” He called.

“Don’t go! It’s a trap.” North said, grabbing his shoulder, “They wanna get you out in the open. Don’t go, Markus.”

“I’m unarmed, Markus. I just wanna talk.” The man yelled.

“I need to hear what he has to say.” Markus turned away from North.

“What if they kill you?” She said.

“Then that’s a chance I'll have to take.” He stood at the edge of the barricade, then hopped down. Nines felt panic worming inside of him as Markus walked out to meet the man. He couldn’t hear what they were saying through the whistling of the wind. He blinked the snow out of his eyes, trying to see what was going on.

Markus turned and walked steadily back to the barricade.

“What happened, Markus? What did he say?” North asked anxiously. Markus silently pushed past them and stood on a box in the center of the barricade. He stood there for a moment, surveying the scene around him. Nines waited, feeling sick, for him to speak.

“The humans are about to launch an attack. And we will show them that we are not afraid. If we must die today, then we will die free.” He said, voice steady even as Nines could see his hands shaking at his sides. 

Nines heard the noise of something being thrown and whipped his head around in time to see a grenade being thrown into the barricade.

He didn’t have time to react as it blew. The blast knocked Markus down from the box and sent Nines to his knees.

His ears were ringing and his vision went out for several seconds. When he could see again, he was on the ground. He saw people scattering around him, running away as the soldiers stormed into the barricade. He tried to get to his feet but felt a heavy boot kick him down to the ground again. He rolled to look up at the soldier who was aiming their gun at him.

He had a split second to decide what to do. He could try to aim a kick at the soldier’s legs, or grab the gun. 

He reached out and wrestled the gun from the soldiers hands, aiming it back at the soldier as he shakily stood up again. Before the soldier could try to do something, Nines tossed the gun to the side and ran, following the flow of the few deviants who were still remaining.

It made his guts wrench to see the bodies around him, Thirium staining the snow so the ground around him was blue more often than it was white. He had exceptional balance, being an(albeit hand-built) advanced model, but even he found it difficult to keep his balance in the snow.

Nines dove out of the way as he was shot at, sliding in the snow. His body hit the ground at full force and he smacked his head. The sudden pain pulled him back into a memory.

_ He remembered Gavin slipping and falling in the snow, shouting at him to go, go, run away and save himself. He remembered diving back towards him, trying to grab him and pull him along. He remembered the sharp, biting pain in his forehead as the bullet hit him.  _

__ _ He hadn’t been completely shut down as Gavin sobbed over him. He hadn’t been able to open his eyes, but he heard his choked cries. It hurt more than the bullet in his head did to hear Gavin’s voice as he shut down. _

Nines didn’t realize he had stayed on the ground until he was being hauled to his feet by somebody. It took him a moment to clear his head of the memories, but by the time he could focus on seeing again, he was being dragged along by Markus. He forced his feet to move, scrambling to keep up, running to join the others.

He found himself with his back to the small numbers of deviants who were still left, backed into a corner. There were soldiers advancing from all sides, guns trained on them.

This was it. He was going to die. 

Panic filled his processors, for just a moment, and then it was overridden by a crushing sadness. Not for the loss of his own life, but for the fact that he wouldn’t ever see Gavin again. All the work Gavin had gone through to bring him back would be for nothing.

He took a step forward before he even realized what he was doing, joining Markus and North where they stood, staring down the soldiers.

He felt strangely peaceful, even with the wind howling combined with the roar of a helicopter somewhere above, and the heavy sounds of boots stomping through the snow. Then, Markus did something he wasn’t expecting. He stepped forward, opened his mouth, and began to sing.

“Hold on, just a little while longer,” Markus’s voice broke through the sound of the world crumbling, “Hold on, just a little while longer. Hold on, just a little while longer. Everything will be alright. Everything will be alright.”

Nines felt a chill run down his spine. He saw the soldiers grips on their guns falter. North slowly stepped up to join him as he sang.

“Fight on, just a little while longer. Fight on, just a little while longer. Pray on, just a little while longer,” others around him were joining in too, “Everything will be alright. Everything will be alright.”

  
  


Gavin slammed his apartment door and ran down the stairs to the street.

He’d been watching the news, watching the evolution of the protests from the deviants. It made his head spin, watching it all unfold.

Then, Tina had called him.

“Gavin, I’m picking you up in five minutes.” She sounded breathless.

“What? What are you talking about?” He had said, sitting up from the couch.

“Hank and Connor got kicked from the case. Some asshole from the FBI is on it now, and he’s going to meet the protestors.”

“Oh, fuck.”

“Yeah. He’s gonna screw things up. We need to get over there right now!” She’d said.

“Yeah, yeah, okay, fuck! I’ll see you in a minute, let me just grab my phone.” He had raced around his apartment, grabbing his phone, his jacket, patting the cats on the head and then running out the door.

Tina was already at the curb, so he wasted no time climbing into the car. The moment he buckled himself in, she hit the gas. She had a determined look on her face.

“So I take it Nines isn’t back?” She said, running a red light.

“Jesus, take it easy,” he said, “And… no. He’s not. I’m starting to think I might not- He might-“ Gavin stopped. He didn’t want to think about that.

“It’s gonna be fine, Gavin.” She said firmly.

“But what if Kamski sent him over to me but they rounded him up? What if he’s been deactivated?”

“I said it’s gonna be fine.” She tapped her fingers impatiently on the steering wheel.

“How are you holding up, Tina?” He asked after a few more minutes of silence.

“I don’t know. I haven’t thought about myself much these past few weeks. I’ve been worrying about you.”

“Shit,” Gavin said, a pang of guilt rushing through him, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to take over your life with my own bullshit-“

“It’s okay, Gav,” she cracked a smile, “I’m just glad we’re finally going to… sort things out. For real, this time.” She said, tone becoming a bit more grim. Gavin nodded.

She screeched to a stop. They climbed out of the car and surveyed the scene together. Gavin shut the door at the exact moment that there was a loud explosion from somewhere beyond the soldiers.

Several hundred feet in front of him the soldiers were gathered. There were even several tanks, and Gavin saw a news helicopter hovering over the scene. He could heard gunshots and see more explosions throwing long shadows against the buildings for a just a moment. He felt sick.

“Tina, this is… this is horrible.” He cried.

“I know,” She looked just as distraught as he felt, “We have to do something.”

“Let’s try to get closer and see what’s going on.” Gavin suggested.

“They aren’t going to let us!” She responded.

“They’re not going to  _ let us  _ do anything, but I’m not gonna stand here.” Gavin strode towards the crowd of soldiers. 

He had no idea what he was doing, but he had to do something. Maybe if a human showed that they were with the deviants, that would do something? He could only hope. He felt a small glimmer of hope as he heard Tina’s footsteps start up again as she jogged to his side.

“I’m not going to let you get yourself killed alone.”

“Wow, thanks.” He snorted.

“Whatever, dumbass.” She smiled. It was strained, but still real. He patted her on the shoulder.

“Hey. If they really do shoot me… Thank you.”

“For what?” Her brows furrowed.

“For… helping with all this. For being my friend,” god, that word felt strange on his tongue, “I- I’m really grateful for you. Fuck, okay, lets just do this.” His face was burning. Tina laughed.

“That’s the closest you’ve ever been to showing affection! I’m honored!” When he didn’t say anything, she added, “Seriously. I care about you too.” Gavin gave another small smile as they reached the soldiers. They made their way amongst them without issue for a moment, mostly due to the soldiers paying attention to the chaos in front of the crowd.

The deviants had a barricade, but many of the soldiers had breached it and were shooting at the deviants who were scattering. Gavin felt like he’d been punched in the gut, watching it. 

He’d seen his fair share of violence, but this looked like an all-out war. No, not even that. It was slaughter. The deviants were unarmed, they had no chance as the soldiers with their guns and armor and boots shot and kicked and killed until there were only a handful left.

The few deviants who had made it out grouped up again, but they were being backed into a corner. They were far away, but Gavin saw Markus at the head of the group. All he could really make out was his silhouette, but he recognized him. There were a few Androids standing right next to him. One of them stuck out to him. He was taller than most of the Androids around him. Gavin pushed his way forward in the crowd again, ignoring Tina’s protests, trying to get a better look.

“Hey, who the hell are you? What are you doing here?” Someone grabbed his arm, pulling him backwards. Gavin snarled and wrestled his arm back, running forward til he was in front of the lines of soldiers who were still hanging back. 

Most of them were surrounding the deviants, guns trained on them. Gavin’s eyes widened when he saw, and he stopped short just beyond the line of soldiers.

There he was, standing tall, only a few steps behind Markus. 

Nines. 

Nines, up and running, alive, in the revolution. The relief Gavin felt in that instant was overwhelming. His chest felt like it was going to burst, he was so giddy just to see him alive.

Then, he came crashing back to reality as the soldiers surrounding the group raised their guns again. He wanted to call out but his voice was stuck, wanted to run forward and grab hold of Nines and never let go, but he couldn’t move. 

He watched, shaking, as Markus stepped forward. Then, he started to sing. Gavin could barely hear him from where he stood, but something about it compelled him to move again. He walked forward slowly, feeling like he was in a trance.

He felt chills ripple across his skin as the other deviants joined in and sang. Gavin kept his eyes on Nines, who hadn’t started singing yet. Then, he opened his mouth, and the voice Gavin had been longing to hear for so long filled the air.

“Sing on, just a little while longer. Sing on just a little while longer,” there were harmonies rising from the crowd of voices, and Gavin felt his body begin to shake as he continued forward, “Sing on, just a little while longer. Everything will be alright.” The rich tones of their voices filled Gavin’s soul.

“Everything will be alright.” Nines’s voice rose a little above the rest as he saw Gavin. 

The soldiers were lowing their guns, but Gavin barely noticed. All he cared about was Nines. He stepped past the line of soldiers until he was only a few feet away from Nines, and then he spoke.

“N-“ his voice broke, so he tried again, “Nines?” The Android’s LED was spinning yellow as he stared down at Gavin. It circled into red, and Gavin could see tears gathering in his eyes. They were strangely beautiful, Gavin thought to himself, blue and glittering in the low light. He barely noticed as tears started to spill down his own cheeks.

They were only inches apart, now, and Gavin put his hands on Nines’s shoulders. Neither of them spoke. He could feel the tension bleeding away from his body just from feeling the fabric of Nines’s shirt again. He moved his hands up to Nines’s face, cupping him there, and watched as the Android bit his lip in an attempt to keep the tears at bay. It didn’t work, so Nines squeezed his eyes shut and rested his forehead against Gavin’s.

“I missed you,” Gavin rasped, “So, so much. I thought I wasn’t gonna see you ever again.” They were both crying now, letting the tears flow freely. “Don’t you fucking  _ dare  _ get hurt ever again.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Nines said, and fuck it was so good to hear him speak for even a moment. They stood there, foreheads pressed together, Nines wrapping his arms around Gavin. Gavin shook against him, holding him as tightly as he could without hurting him. It felt so good, so fucking good to have him back.

As they stood there, desperately drinking in the sensation of each other's touch, Gavin decided that he wasn’t ever going to let Nines go. He wouldn’t give him up for the world.

Distantly, they were aware of the sound of thousands of Android footsteps approaching. Still wrapped up in the moment, they barely processed it as Connor led an army of deviants to them. Thousands of mostly identical models, marching in perfect lines behind him. 

They watched, still holding each other as Connor and Markus talked. The soldiers fell back. Markus made his way back to the ruins of the barricade and stood on top of one of the few intact boxes. North and Connor followed and stood behind him. Nines and Gavin stood at the base of the box, looking up at him. Gavin realized that Nines hadn’t let go of his waist, and he smiled softly.

“From the very first day of our existence, we have kept our pain to ourselves. We suffered in silence. But now the time has come for us to raise our heads up, and tell humans who we really are. To tell them that we are people too! In fact, we are a nation!” Markus spoke, voice carrying out over the wind and the murmurs from the crowd, “This is the moment where we forget our bitterness and bandage our wounds. When we forgive our enemies. Humans are both our creators and our oppressors, and tomorrow, we must make them our partners. Maybe even one day our friends. But the time for anger is over. Now, we must build a common future, based on tolerance, and respect. We are alive! And now… we are free!”

The cheers of thousands of Androids rose up around them, and Gavin found himself whooping right along with them. Nines had the biggest smile Gavin had ever seen him give on his face.

 

“Hey, dipshit!” Gavin heard a call from behind him, and turned around to see Tina approaching. She had a tired grin on her face. Most of the deviants had left, going back to wherever they had found shelter before. Connor, Markus and the others were negotiating with the FBI agents who were at the scene. Nines had tried to tag along, but Gavin had pulled him away. It was selfish, he knew, but he wasn’t sure that he cared.

“Hey.” He said, briefly letting go of Nines’s hand to hug Tina. She patted his shoulder and then pulled away, looking Nines up and down.

”So. You’re the guy I’ve heard so much about.” She smirked.

“I’ve heard about you as well,” Nines smiled kindly, “Gavin says you’re his best friend.”

”Whoah, hey!” Gavin felt his face flush, “I-“

“I know I am.” She said, punching his shoulder lightly.

“Whatever,” he said, still blushing, then turned back to Nines, “Hey, can we uh… can we leave?”

“I would love to. Your temperature is veering into dangerously low levels, it would be best to get you somewhere warm.”

“I’m assuming you want me to drive you?” Tina said.

“Shit, yeah.” Gavin said. It was times like this he wished that he had his own car. Mostly so he could kiss Nines’s brains out while the car drove them home.

“Let’s go, you big nerds.” Tina turned away. Gavin grabbed Nines’s hand again, feeling giddy.

Things weren’t perfect, but he felt hopeful for the first time in weeks. Hopeful for  _ real _ , not the aching in his chest when he had been hoping to get Nines back. But now he was back. He was back, he was alive, he was okay. Holy shit. He couldn’t help grinning, swinging their hands a little.

“You’re happy.” Nines commented.

“Of course I am, asshole, I missed you.” Gavin stopped as they reached Tina’s car. Before they got in the car, Gavin turned to Nines and pulled him closed. He leaned forward and kissed him, and holy fuck, no kiss had ever felt better.

Nines’s lips were warm despite the cold air, and his hands were so soft as they cupped Gavin’s face. Gavin moaned a little as Nines deepened the kiss. His knees felt weak, but Nines’s steady hands caught him.

Tina rolled down the driver’s window and coughed.

“Hey, lovebirds, keep it in your pants til you get home.” She snorted. Gavin grinned sheepishly.

“Sorry.” He and Nines slid into the car. They both sat in the backseat, Nines keeping a firm grip on Gavin’s hand. He felt so warm, so happy, just holding his hand. This felt so right. Nines, his warmth next to him, it was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s almost over, guys, this is wild.   
> I’m planning to start another fic before posting the last chapter of this one, just to try to keep a semi-continuous stream of content going, so check my list of works some time in the next couple days and you should see something new!  
> I’m also considering doing some oneshots in the future that are sort of like little scenes that I didn’t quite get to in this fic, like maybe just some cute stuff of them hanging out in the simulation and stuff. Let me know if you would enjoy that!  
> Thank you all so much for reading once again, and hang in there! Only one more chapter to go.


	13. Secret For The Mad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ‘“Let’s go the fuck home, Nines.” He rushed into the building. Nines wasn’t expecting the rush of joy that he felt at the word home. Was this going to be his home? With Gavin?’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vDdx1dba6c  
> Ayyyy so I uh. Tried to work on another short fic but as you can see, I haven’t posted anything. I should *actually* have something up this weekend, I just haven’t had a ton of time to write this week(thanks finals).  
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter! It’s short, sweet, and gets a lil’ uh.... you’ll see ;;;;;;)

**_“I promise you_ **

**_It’ll all make sense again”_ **

  
  


Gavin practically dragged a Nines out of the car as soon as Tina pulled up in front of his apartment.

“Thanks, Tina. For all of this.” He said.

“Of course. You owe me big time, though.” She smiled. He laughed.

“Alright. Let’s go the fuck home, Nines.” He rushed into the building. Nines wasn’t expecting the rush of joy that he felt at the word home. Was this going to be his home? With Gavin? He sure hoped so. He also wasn’t expecting Gavin to grab him the moment they were inside the hallway and press him against the wall.

“Gavin? I-“ Gavin cut him off by kissing him, hard. Gavin ran his hands up and down Nines’s sides, trying to take in the sensation of holding him as much as he could. He let out a surprised grunt as Nines flipped him around so he was pressed against the wall, and began to ravish Gavin’s neck. Gavin pulled him closer. It felt so, so good, his mouth, his tongue, his hands. All of it was right. 

Nines pulled away for a moment to take in the sight of Gavin in front of him, gasping for breath, blinking his eyes open. He pulled Nines’s face forward, kissing him again. Nines smiled into the kiss.

“Gavin, as much as I would like to continue, there is still a 28% chance that someone will enter this hallway.” Gavin whined in protest for a moment, then took Nines’s hand again and started up the stairs.

They made it to Gavin’s apartment, miraculously with their clothes still on. Before opening the door, Gavin suddenly got nervous.

“I uh- I haven’t cleaned it in a while. And I have three cats, they’re kind of assholes. You remember that, probably.” He rambled.

“Gavin,” Nines said, pressing a kiss to his temple, “It’s okay. I’m sure it’s lovely.” Gavin smiled shakily and opened the door. He flicked on the lights, and had to close the door abruptly to keep the cats from running into the hall.

“Hey, BB, Prissy, Mousetrap,” he chuckled, reaching down to pet all of them, “I love you too, but right now I got me a robot to fuck.” Nines laughed as Gavin hung up his coat.

“I suppose I’ll get a proper introduction to them later.”

“Yeah, yeah. Fuck, Nines, I missed you so much.” Gavin said, pulling him down the hall into his bedroom. He didn’t have time to say anything else before Nines was picking him up and putting him on the bed.

Nines kissed him again, all teeth and tongue. Gavin didn’t even mind as Nines bit his lip roughly, then sucked at it to soothe it. The sensation sent a shiver down his spine. Gavin pulled away for just a moment to discard his shirt, and Nines did the same. This time, Gavin let himself truly appreciate the Android.

He’d seen him shirtless before, cleaning his shoulder, but he hadn’t let himself stare. Now, in the soft light flowing in from the window, he was radiant. Gavin couldn’t help but stare. His skin almost glittered, and his eyes most definitely did. 

Nines was staring at him as well. His tan skin was laced with scars, and Nines made a mental note to ask about each and every one of them. 

He leaned in and kissed Gavin again, tangling his hands in the man’s hair. He relished in the way that Gavin groaned when he pulled at his hair, so he did it again. 

He pushed Gavin down onto the bed and straddled him, kissing his neck again and then trailing down his chest, paying attention to how he would gasp softly when Nines bit at certain places. 

“Nines- fucking- hurry up!” He groaned. Nines just chuckled softly.

“Mmm, no, I think I’ll take my sweet time with you.” He said, smirking as Gavin bit back a whine.

He unzipped Gavin’s pants and shifted his weight a little so he could kick them all the way off. He smiled fondly as Gavin’s shaking hands did their best to remove Nines’s pants as well. Gavin groaned again as Nines palmed him through his boxers.

He crushed their lips together once again, then moved down to kiss Gavin’s jaw. He nosed against the man’s stubble, then once again turned his attention to his neck. He bit Gavins neck, sucking deep bruises to the surface of his skin. 

Gavin wrapped his legs around Nines’s hips, pulling their bodies together. He rolled his hips down, feeling Nines gasp into his neck. Nines bucked his hips up against him, making Gavin whine and claw at his back.

“Please, Nines, please-“

“Shhh,” Nines soothed, “be patient. Can you do that for me?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, fuck.” Gavin gasped as Nines pulled his boxers down and slid a finger into him. Fuck, how was his finger already slick? Were Androids self lubricating? He simultaneously very much did and absolutely did not want to think about that.

Fortunately, he wasn’t able to dwell on it long as Nines purred encouragement into his ear and slid another finger in. Gavin squirmed, rolling his hips down onto Nines. He moaned, begging for more, more,  _ more _ .

Nines pulled his fingers out after a moment, and Gavin let out a low whine at the loss of contact. He was rewarded a moment later, though, but Nines pushing inside of him.

“Fuck-“ he whined again, but was silenced by Nines kissing him roughly. Nines ran his hands up and down Gavin’s spine making him shiver, then gripped his thighs and set a steady rhythm that had Gavin gasping.

“Is this okay?” He asked, since Gavin had said anything between moans in a while.

“Yes. God, yes. More than okay.” He said through gritted teeth, rolling his hips down to meet Nines. He twisted his hands in the sheets. It felt so, so good, having Nines fuck him. Honestly, he probably would have been content with just going to sleep with the Android hugging him, but this was infinitely better. His hands were warm as they gripped Gavin, soft and smooth but holding him tightly.

It was so much better than it ever could have been in the simulation. Gavin was a little ashamed to think that he had considered fucking him in the simulation. Granted, that was before he even had the thought in his head that Nines could have a real body.

And what a body it was. Gavin opened his eyes, barely even realizing that they had been shut tightly. Nines was biting his lip as he thrust into him, and his face was flushed blue. God, he looked so good. His usually perfect hair was loose, messily framing his face, and it brought Gavin some satisfaction to see him looking this disheveled. Of course, it just made him look even hotter. 

Nines shifted a little, and Gavin bit back a loud moan at the new angle. God, he was so close.

“Nines, please, please,” he begged, “Please, I need to- I need-“ His begging turned into a moan and then a strangled cry of Nines’s name as he came, and moments later Nines did too. He squeezed his eyes shut, biting his lip as both of their movements shuddered to a stop.

Slowly, Nines slid off of Gavin to rest at his side. He pressed lazy kisses to Gavin’s neck and shoulders. Gavin slung an arm around him, shifting so his face was pressed into the Android’s chest. He sighed contentedly.

“I missed you.” He said softly.

“I can tell,” Nines joked, stroking his hair, “I missed you, too. I knew that I had to get to Jericho because if I tried to get to you, I would be killed, but… the whole time, a different mission tried to take over. Find Gavin. That’s what it was telling me.”

“I’m glad you went to Jericho, ‘nd things turned out okay. I’m glad that you’re here.” Gavin knew he wasn’t exactly coherent. The little adrenaline he had left was running low.

“I am too.”

“Hey, Nines?” He mumbled sleepily.

“Yes?” Nines said, smiling as he watched Gavin drift into unconsciousness.

“Don’t you ever leave me.”

 

Gavin woke up the next morning and nearly cried when he saw that Nines was still there. There was light filtering in through the window, white and calm. He felt so much calmer than he had in so long, despite the chaos he knew was roiling in the outside world. They were going to have to deal with the aftermath of the revolution, he knew, but he didn’t need to think about that right now.

He snuggled closer to Nines, relishing in the fact that he was here for good. Nines’s eyes blinked open, and he gave Gavin a smile that melted his heart.

“Good morning.”

“Morning,” Gavin replied sleepily, “I’m gonna go make some breakfast. What time is it?”

“10:34 am.” Nines said, watching as Gavin sat up. He stretched, back aching.

“You really did a number on me last night.” he chuckled, running a hand over the numerous marks on his neck.

“I’m surprised you had the energy for it. You were exhausted.” Nines said.

“Yeah, well,” Gavin flushed, “I just- I like you a lot.”

“As do I.”

 

It was about a month later, and Gavin was standing on the balcony next to his boyfriend. Holy shit. His  _ boyfriend _ . He couldn’t help smiling giddily, leaning into Nines.

“You’re in a good mood.” Nines said.

“How could I not be? I have the hottest Android on the planet as my boyfriend.”

“What a charmer.” Nines snorted fondly. He put an arm around Gavin’s shoulder. The snow that had blanketed the city for months was mostly melted, now, only remaining in large piles on the sides of roads. There were already eager green buds on some of the trees. The sky was clear and calm and blue.

It was absolutely beautiful, and Gavin had never been more glad that he had someone to share the view with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There’s the happy ending I promised! Thank you all for sticking with me through this and being so supportive of the first thing I’ve ever posted on here.  
> I plan to keep writing stuff for this pairing, so keep an eye out for more stuff in the future! I already have another big thing planned, but that one won’t come for a while.  
> Big thank you to Lottie_Bean for helping me write smut(among other things), and being generally supportive! If you haven’t already, please go read her fic, it’s really good!  
> Thanks for reading everyone, I really appreciate every single person who’s given kudos, commented, or even just read this! <3<3<3


End file.
